n, Public Speaking,
and Debating." New York. Fowler and Wells. Price 80 cents.

[F] La Bruyere

[G] "Etiquette for Gentlemen."

[H] Chesterfield.

VII.

THE ETIQUETTE OF OCCASIONS.

Great plenty, much formality, small cheer,
And everybody out of his own sphere.--_Byron._

I.--DINNER PARTIES.

A young man or a young woman, unaccustomed to the settled observances
of such occasions, can hardly pass through a severer ordeal than a
formal dinner. Its terrors, however, are often greatly magnified. Such
a knowledge of the principal points of table etiquette as you may
acquire from this book, complete self-possession, habits of
observation, and a fair share of practical good sense, will carry one
safely if not pleasantly through it.

You may entertain the opinion that such dinners, and formal parties in
general, are tiresome affairs, and that there might be quite as much
real courtesy and a great deal more enjoyment with less ceremony, and
we may entirely agree with you; but what _is_, and not what _might
be_, is the point to be elucidated. We are to take society as we find
it. You may, as a general rule, decline invitations to dinner parties
without any breach of good manners, and without giving offense, if you
think that neither your enjoyment nor your interests will be promoted
by accepting; or you may not go into what is technically called
"society" at all, and yet you are liable, at a hotel, on board a
steamer, or on some extraordinary occasion, to be placed in a position
in which ignorance of dinner etiquette will be very mortifying and
the information contained in this section be worth a hundred times the
cost of the book.

We now proceed to note the common routine of a fashionable dinner, as
laid down in books and practiced in polite society. On some points
usage is not uniform, but varies in different countries, and even in
different cities in the same country, as well as in different circles
in the same place. For this reason you must not rely wholly upon this
or any other manners book, but, keeping your eyes open and your wits
about you, _wait and see what others do_, and follow the prevailing
mode.

1. _Invitations._

Invitations to a dinner are usually issued several days before the
appointed time--the length of time being proportioned to the grandeur
of the occasion. On receiving one, you should answer at once,
addressing the lady of the house. You should either accept or declin