g
if I had ever had a virgin, saying, "Are you sure, did you see her cunt
before you had her? Would you not like one again, if I can get you one,
a young virgin French girl, one sure to be a virgin?"--and so on until
she made me doubt if I had ever had one. At last I thought that I should
like to have another. Well, she could get me a young French girl, but
would have to go to France, it would cost a large sum of money. This
talk went on for some time, and little by little I agreed to give her
fifty pounds to pay her journey, and also to keep her lodgings on. She
postponed the journey for a long time, but at length she went. She made
me promise to do something for the girl besides paying her,--which meant
something or nothing,--but I promised to pay the journey of the virgin
back to France, should she want to go; and also whenever I had the girl,
to pay Camille a "Victoria," "because," said she, "you will have my
rooms and prevent my bringing friends home."

So I came down with fifty pounds. Off she went in quiet dress, and
looked a quiet lady or middle-class woman. She advised me to keep myself
steady, and the very moment before she left, whilst the cab was at the
door, I turned her with bonnet and travelling dress on, bum outwards,
and fucked her; she hurrying me all the time for fear she should loose
the coach, she had not time to piss, or wipe or wash. "It will give me
good fortune perhaps," said she laughing, "or make you wish me back, it
is lucky for me."

There was but a slow rail to Dover then, nothing but tidal boats, and
to Paris, the way I thought she was going, no rail at all, and it was
a long journey. Whether she went to Paris or not I don't know, but from
later experience think not, that she was a Southern woman, and went
straight home. She was to be back in a month. It came, but not she;
another week, another, and I began to think I had been sold; another,
and I gave her up altogether, and experienced a little relief, for the
habit of seeing her had so got hold of me, that I could not shake it
off, and yet I was tired of her, but I wanted the virgin.

There was a middle-aged man with whom I chummed much at my Club, a major
retired, and a most debauched individual. He borrowed money of me, and
did not repay it. His freedom of talk about women made him much liked by
the younger men; the older said it was discreditable to help younger men
to ruin. Ordinarily very careful how I spoke about women ( for my l