urch was over, and
came back in time for our early dinner, telling my mother I had been
to ------ church. Then I reflected and thought it was as well I had not
done it to Susan.

When mother returned she left my sister and little brother in the
country. My old deaf relative remained with us and slept in the room
adjoining my mother's. That same Sunday night, I waited until Susan came
up to bed, pounced upon her on the top landing and tried to feel her;
she dropped her candle-stick and made such a noise, that back I sneaked
to bed, and was asleep, when I heard the bell ringing violently in
the servants' room. Out I rushed saw Susan on the landing with but
a petticoat over her night-dress, and old Mrs. ------ going into my
mother's room who was taken very ill.

Down to the kitchen went Susan and I to get boiling water, I heaped wood
and coals on the fire, she blew it with the bellows, old Mrs. ------
was upstairs getting brandy and other things ready. What followed I
recollect as well as if it were yesterday. Susan was half squatting,
half kneeling and blowing the fire furiously. Standing by her my
randiness came on, I pulled out my prick, and pushed it right in her
face. "For shame!" said she, "I will hit you with the bellows, think of
your mother." It did shame me for a moment, I hid my prick, and knelt
by her side stirring the blazing wood. But just then I saw her breasts
through the half-tied night-gown; it was too much for me; that and the
attitude she was in together; loosing all prudence, I pushed one hand
on to her breast, and the other up her clothes, between her legs,--which
were very conveniently opened quite wide,--and on the slit of her cunt
With a suppressed cry she dropped the bellows, attempted to rise, and
repulse my hand, and in doing so we both rolled backwards ( for I had
stooped) on to the floor among the black-beetles of which there were
dozens about. "You wretch," she cried in a suppressed voice, "oh!
don't,--and your poor mother so ill,--oh! don't,--you shant!--and
wanting hot water,--you shant!" in a still louder tone as I got my hand
full on her cunt. "Oh! my God, here is Mrs. ------."

Had Mrs. ------ not been as deaf as a post, she must have heard our
scuffling, as she neared the kitchen. In an hour or so my mother was
better, and Mrs. ------ stopped in the room with her for the night. My
mother was asleep when I left, Mrs. ------ had had a good dose of brandy
and water, and I knew she would