ery way, and until now nothing but
sorrow has come of it. But my point--is this,--I see so clearly, now
that it is too late, that two excellent persons may demoralize each
other if they are ill-mated. It may be possible that I had the germs of
false ambition in me when I was a girl, yet I was conscious only of the
ideal which is in most women's hearts....
"You must not think that I have laid my soul bare in the hope of
changing your mind in regard to Gertrude. I recognize clearly, now, that
that is impossible. Oh, I know you do not so misjudge me," she added,
reading his quick protest in his face.
"Indeed, I cannot analyze my reasons for telling you something of which
I have never spoken to any one else."
Mrs. Constable regarded him fixedly. "You are the strongest reason. You
have somehow drawn it out of me.... And I suppose I wish some one to
profit by it. You can, Mr. Hodder,--I feel sure of that. You may
insist now that my argument against your present conviction of the
indissolubility of marriage is mere individualism, but I want you
to think of what I have told you, not to answer me now. I know your
argument by heart, that Christian character develops by submission, by
suffering, that it is the woman's place to submit, to efface herself.
But the root of the matter goes deeper than that. I am far from
deploring sacrifice, yet common-sense tells us that our sacrifice should
be guided by judgment, that foolish sacrifices are worse than
useless. And there are times when the very limitations of our
individuality--necessary limitation's for us--prevent our sacrifices
from counting.
"I was wrong, I grant you, grievously wrong in the course I took, even
though it were not consciously deliberate. But if my husband had been an
artist I should always have remained separated from his real life by a
limitation I had no power to remove. The more I tried, the more apparent
my lack of insight became to him, the more irritated he grew. I studied
his sketches, I studied masterpieces, but it was all hopeless. The thing
wasn't in me, and he knew it wasn't. Every remark made him quiver.
"The Church, I think, will grow more liberal, must grow more liberal, if
it wishes to keep in touch with people in an age when they are thinking
out these questions for themselves. The law cannot fit all cases, I am
sure the Gospel can. And sometimes women have an instinct, a kind of
second sight into persons, Mr. Hodder. I cannot explain why
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