ticing the evident gusto with which he emptied his glass, at the
same time pronouncing it to be "a very fine wine," which he assigned
to the vintage of '76. I own too I felt a little nervous when the
Professorial Butler, I think not without a sly twinkle in his eye,
gave all the party a _liqueur_ of petroleum for Green Chartreuse, but
they certainly seemed to find it all right, and so my apprehensions
disappeared.

Thus my "Little Dinner" came at length to a conclusion. That it was
an undoubted success, from a financial point of view, there can be
no sort of doubt, for fourpence more than covered the cost of the
materials, to which, adding the Professorial Butler's fee of two
shillings and sixpence, brings the whole cost of the entertainment up
to eightpence-halfpenny a head. It is true I have not heard whether
any of my guests have suffered any ill-effects from partaking of my
hospitality, but I suppose if any of them had died or been seized with
violent symptoms, the fact would have been notified to me. So, on
the whole, I may congratulate myself. I certainly could not afford
to entertain largely in any other fashion, but, with the aid of the
Professorial Butler, I am already contemplating giving a series of
nice "Little Dinners," and even on a more extended scale. Indeed, with
the assistance of Hypnotism, it is possible, at a trifling cost, to
see one's friends. And in the general interests of Society, I mean to
do it.

* * * * *

[Illustration: FANCY PORTRAIT.

(_After reading the Correspondence on Fruit and Birds in the "Morning
Post."_)

THE BRIGAND BULLFINCH.]

* * * * *

BULLYING POOR "BULLY."

SAYS the Blackbird to the Bullfinch, "It is April; let us up!
We will breakfast on the plum-germs, on the pear-buds we will sup."
Says the Bullfinch to the Blackbird, "We'll devour them every bit,
And quite ruin the fruit-growers, with some aid from the Tom-tit."
Then these garden Machiavellis set to work and did not stop
Till the promise of September prematurely plumped each crop.
Ah! the early frost is ruthless, and the caterpillar's cruel,
But, to spifflicate the plum or give the gooseberry its gruel,
To confusticate the apple, or to scrumplicate the pear,
Discombobulate the cherry, make the grower tear his hair,
And in general play old gooseberry with the orchard and the garden,
Till the Autumn crop won't fetch the grumpy