city
purposes order for our dinner in public, but stuff made out of common
grapes, I guess, and with the seltzer left out.

Well, dearie, the reason I hand you all this info. is that the story I
am going to tell you got started because of this wine. "In Venus
Veritas" you know or so they say, and I confess that in trying to get a
little kick out of the stuff I got sort of lit and that's what caused me
the story.

II

WELL, we was sort of waiting off stage as you might call it, in a little
town in Belgium, our act having just been on and a pretty lively one it
was and the Captain give us a pretty good hand on it, although as you
know the audience didn't wait for the finish but left us their orchestra
seats or front line trenches which we moved into and then give up to the
next number on the bill and come back to watch from the wings, or would
of only we was a little too far off.

Well, the Capt. felt so good and the water was so bad that he sent a
delegation back for a little liquid refreshment. They have big jugs over
here like the molasses is kept in at home only here it is frankly boose
and no one pretends any different. And the game is this. The one which
volunteers for this dangerous work, if broke himself, takes a swig or so
out of the jug he is bringing back which it dont show on account of
their not being transparent and so the officer dont get any surprise
until toward the end of the jug and even so may think he took more than
he had thought. The private will take only a little from each but if
there is jugs enough many a mickle makes quite a jag.

Well, me and a fellow named McFarland and a French kid called Ceasare
was each given two of these molasses jugs which looked like props, and
was sent off to a village some place in congnito for you couldn't
pronounce it. And we was glad enough to go because among other things we
was short of smokes. Some cleaver actor had accidintly lit the last
mess fire with a bale of Virginias and there wasnt hardly a smoke among
us.

You just figure out how it would feel if you was to have a bath and do
your exercise and eat a swell breakfast and then realise there wasnt a
pill in the house! Think sweetie, how your brest would swell up with
alarm, and the royal fit you would throw while the elevator boy was on
his way to the corner drug store! Why figure even the way you feel once
you get a cigarette in your face and then cant find a match for two
whole minutes. Well, ta