s a visit it is for the purpose of wasting other people's time, not
one's own.

LORD CAVERSHAM. Have you been thinking over what I spoke to you about
last night?

LORD GORING. I have been thinking about nothing else.

LORD CAVERSHAM. Engaged to be married yet?

LORD GORING. [_Genially_.] Not yet: but I hope to be before lunch-time.

LORD CAVERSHAM. [_Caustically_.] You can have till dinner-time if it
would be of any convenience to you.

LORD GORING. Thanks awfully, but I think I'd sooner be engaged before
lunch.

LORD CAVERSHAM. Humph! Never know when you are serious or not.

LORD GORING. Neither do I, father.

[_A pause_.]

LORD CAVERSHAM. I suppose you have read _The Times_ this morning?

LORD GORING. [_Airily_.] The Times? Certainly not. I only read _The
Morning Post_. All that one should know about modern life is where the
Duchesses are; anything else is quite demoralising.

LORD CAVERSHAM. Do you mean to say you have not read _The Times_ leading
article on Robert Chiltern's career?

LORD GORING. Good heavens! No. What does it say?

LORD CAVERSHAM. What should it say, sir? Everything complimentary, of
course. Chiltern's speech last night on this Argentine Canal scheme was
one of the finest pieces of oratory ever delivered in the House since
Canning.

LORD GORING. Ah! Never heard of Canning. Never wanted to. And did
. . . did Chiltern uphold the scheme?

LORD CAVERSHAM. Uphold it, sir? How little you know him! Why, he
denounced it roundly, and the whole system of modern political finance.
This speech is the turning-point in his career, as _The Times_ points
out. You should read this article, sir. [_Opens_ The Times.] 'Sir
Robert Chiltern . . . most rising of our young statesmen . . . Brilliant
orator . . . Unblemished career . . . Well-known integrity of character
. . . Represents what is best in English public life . . . Noble contrast
to the lax morality so common among foreign politicians.' They will
never say that of you, sir.

LORD GORING. I sincerely hope not, father. However, I am delighted at
what you tell me about Robert, thoroughly delighted. It shows he has got
pluck.

LORD CAVERSHAM. He has got more than pluck, sir, he has got genius.

LORD GORING. Ah! I prefer pluck. It is not so common, nowadays, as
genius is.

LORD CAVERSHAM. I wish you would go into Parliament.

LORD GORING. My dear father, only people who look dull ever get into th