big difference of opinion with himself, Mawruss,
what kind of a difference of opinion is he going to have with the
collector of internal revenue? So I guess the only thing for me to do is
to start all over again and this time I'll multiply the result by two,
because if I've got to pay anything extra to the government,
y'understand, I'd just as lieve do it without getting indicted first."

"Say!" Morris exclaimed. "If they started in to indict everybody which
is going to figure up their income tax wrong this year, Abe, the
government would got to draft a couple of million grand-jurymen, and
then lay off the workers on cantonments and put them to building
jails."

"And labor is scarce enough as it is, Mawruss, when you figure the
hundreds of thousands of sitsons of this country which has been taken
out of active business life during the past sixty days while they were
engaged in making up their income-tax returns," Abe said.

"Well, that will simplify things a whole lot next year, Abe," Morris
declared, "particularly in the excessive-profits department, because
owing to the time they spent in doping out what excessive profits they
had last year, the business men of the country won't have any profits
this year, excessive or otherwise."

"I should only make enough this year to pay a certified public
accountant for fixing up my income-tax return next year, Mawruss, and I
shall be satisfied," Abe said, "because who could tell, maybe next year,
Mawruss, the government wouldn't stop at wanting to know what your
income is and how you made it, but would also insist on knowing how you
spent it after it was made, which if business is so bad next year on
account of the war, Mawruss, it may be that the government, finding that
they couldn't raise enough money with an income tax and an
excessive-profits tax, will pass a law calling for a personal-extravagance
tax."

"They could get a lot of revenue that way," Morris admitted.

"Yes, and they could get it coming and going," Abe said. "Take, for
instance, the hotel and restaurant hat-check business, which I seen it
in the papers that a partnership of hat-checkers got into a dissolution
lawsuit the other day, and it come out that they made a quarter of a
million dollars profit in less than five years, y'understand. Now in a
case like that, Mawruss, the government couldn't tax them robbers an
additional eight per cent., because hat-checking ain't a profession
under 'A. INCOME FROM