to it.' All a United States Senator has got to do is to look like
he is preparing to say something, y'understand, and before he can get
out so much as 'Brother President and fellow-members of this
organization,' LaFollette jumps up and says, 'I'm sorry, but I disagree
with you.'"

"That must make him pretty popular in the Senate," Abe remarked.

"Popular's no name for it," Morris continued. "There ain't a United
States Senator which wouldn't stand willing to dig down and pay for a
set of engrossed resolutions out of his own pocket, just so long as
Senator LaFollette would resign or something."

"But Senator LaFollette ain't one of them peace fellers, Mawruss," Abe
said.

"Sure, I know," Morris replied. "All he wants is to run the war
according to Cushing's _Manual_. If he had his way we wouldn't be able
to give an order for so much as one-twelfth dozen guns, y'understand,
without it come up in the form of a motion that it is regularly moved
and seconded that the Secretary of War be and he is hereby authorized to
order the same and all those in favor will signify the same by saying
aye, y'understand, and even then, Abe, him and Senator Vardaman would
call for a show of hands under Section Twelve, Subsection D, of the
by-laws."

"Then I suppose if a few thousand American soldiers gets killed on
account they 'ain't got the right kind of guns, Mawruss, we could lay it
to Section Twelve, Subsection D, of the by-laws," Abe suggested.

"And you could give some of them Senators credit for an assist, Abe,
because you take a Senator like that, Abe, and when he holds up the
ammunition supply with a two-hour speech, y'understand, he _oser_
worries his head how many American soldiers is going to be killed by the
Germans in France six months later, just so long as his own name is
spelled right by the newspapers in New York City next morning."

"It would help a whole lot, Mawruss," Abe said, "if Senators and
Congressmen was numbered the same like automobiles, y'understand,
because who is going to waste his breath arguing that the Senate should
pass a law which it's a pipe the Senate ain't going to pass, on account
that nobody is in favor of it except himself and a couple of other
Senators temporarily absent on the road, making Fargo, Minneapolis,
Chicago, and points east as traveling peace conventioners,
y'understand, when he knows that next morning the only notice the New
York newspapers will take of his _Geschrei_ will be, A