h and true,
Webbed hands did wildly wave
With the frog-host against the beaky bird--
"_He_ be our King?" they loudly cried.
"Absurd!

Not Mercury, nor Jupiter _we_ beg
For a devouring despot, lank of leg,
Of prying eye, and frog-transfixing beak;
Though singly we seem weak,
United we are strong to smite or scoff.
Off, would-be tyrant, off!!!"

* * * * *

CHURCH AND STAGE.--Let no rabid Churchmen, of any school of thought,
ever again take exception to the irreligious character of playhouse
entertainments. Let them read the advertisement of the Lyceum Theatre
in _The Times_ for March 13:--"During Holy Week this theatre will be
closed, re-opening on Saturday, March 28, with _The Bells_, which
will also be played on Easter Monday night." Could any arrangement
be more thoroughly in harmony with general ecclesiastical practice?
Any liturgical student knows that the bells are played once on Holy
Saturday, and that they should be played on Easter Monday is a matter
of course.

* * * * *

TRACKS FOR THE TIMES.

[A Magistrate has just decided that the Police have a right
to interfere with the growing practice of using the public
roads of the Metropolis at night-time as running-grounds for
athletes.]

I come from haunts of smoke and grime,
I start in some blind alley,
And race each night against Old Time
Enthusiastically!

I dodge past frightened City gents,
And sometimes send them flying,
Which makes them cherish sentiments
Not wholly edifying.

I wind about, and in and out,
Along the crowded pavement,
While here and there the mockers flout
My costume and behavement.

I slip, I slide, I flash, I flee
Amid the teeming traffic,
And drivers often use to me
Idioms extremely graphic.

I murmur when a Lawyer's view
Absurdly tries to hinder
My turning public roads into
A private path of cinder.

Yet still to "spurt," agile, alert,
Shall be my one endeavour;
For Cits may stare, and Jehus swear,
But I run on for ever!

* * * * *

[Illustration: THE BLIZZARD.

MRS. SELDOM-FESTIVE "AT HOME" (AND THE BEST PLACE TOO!), MARCH 9,
1891.

(_10 to 1 Nobody turns up._)]

* * * * *

A DIARY OF DOVER.

_March, 1891_.--Fearful storm in the Channel, when the _Victoria_