raves gasped. It was his rule never to show emotion, and in
his more studied moments he would have characterised his present
attitude as ill-bred.

"Damn!" It was not his wont to swear. His pose was one of perfect
self-control. He was as self-contained as a modern flat, and about as
small in his intellectual outlook. He was just on the point of reading
the paragraph for the fifth time when the door of his room burst open,
admitting Tom Little, Dick Travers, and Guggers.

"Congrats., Gravy. So the old boy's turned up," cried Little, waving a
copy of _The Oxford Mail_ in Graves's face.

"Joe's is going to do him proud," broke in Travers. "You've seen the
_Mail_? We'll give him the time of his life."

"Gug-gug-good egg!" broke in Guggers, so named because of his inability
to pronounce a "g" without a preliminary "gug-gug" accompanied by
inconvenient splashings. It had become customary at St. Joseph's to
give Guggers plenty of space in front, whenever he approached a "g."
Tom Little called it "Groom."

"We're gug-gug-going to give him a gug-gug-gorgeous time."

"We'll have him drunk from morn till dewy eve," cried Tom Little, "and
extra drunk at night. Oh, my prophetic soul!"

"Gravy, where's your sense of hospitality?" cried Travers. Reggie
reluctantly produced whisky, a syphon, and some glasses.

"By gug-gug-gosh!" cried Guggers, semi-vapourising the remains of a
mouthful of whisky and soda, "won't it be a rag! Bless you,
Gug-Gug-Gravy for having an uncle."

Tom Little explained that they had been to the Sceptre and discovered
that Mr. Josiah Williams would arrive by the 3.3 train, and that St.
Joseph's was going down in a body to meet him. Graves, of course,
would be there.

"I have heard nothing," said Graves. "I--I don't understand. If he
writes of course I'll go."

"You'll jolly well gug-gug-go, any old how, or we'll carry you down,"
cried Guggers in a menacing voice, looking down at Graves from his
six-foot-three of muscle and bone.

Graves looked round him helplessly. What was he to do? Could he
disown this uncle? Should he explain that the whole thing was an
invention, and that he had never possessed a rich uncle in Australia?
Was it possible that by some curious trick there really was a Josiah
Williams, Australian millionaire and philanthropist? If these men
would only go and leave him alone to think!

Then suddenly there presented itself to his mind the other question:
what wou