ou've come to see that neither you, nor any other man, directs
your destiny?

STRANGER. I have.

MOTHER. Then you've already gone part of the way.

STRANGER. But I myself have changed. I'm ruined; for I've lost all
aptitude for writing. And I can't sleep at night.

MOTHER. Indeed!

STRANGER. What are called nightmares stop me. Last and worst: I daren't
die; for I'm no longer sure my miseries will end, with _my_ end.

MOTHER. Oh!

STRANGER. Even worse: I've grown so to loathe myself that I'd escape
from myself, if I knew how. If I were a Christian, I couldn't obey the
first commandment, to love my neighbour as myself, for I should have
to hate him as I hate myself. It's true that I'm a scamp. I've always
suspected it; and because I never wanted life to fool me, I've observed
'others' carefully. When I saw they were no better than I, I resented
their trying to browbeat me.

MOTHER. You've been wrong to think it a matter between you and others.
You have to deal with Him.

STRANGER. With whom?

MOTHER. The Invisible One, who guides your destiny.

STRANGER. Would I could see Him.

MOTHER. It would be your death.

STRANGER. Oh no!

MOTHER. Where do you get this devilish spirit of rebellion? If you won't
bow your neck like the rest, you must be broken like a reed.

STRANGER. I don't know where this fearful stubbornness comes from. It's
true an unpaid bill can make me tremble; but if I were to climb Mount
Sinai and face the Eternal One, I should not cover my face.

MOTHER. Jesus and Mary! Don't say such things. You'll make me think
you're a child of the Devil.

STRANGER. Here that seems the general opinion. But I've heard that those
who serve the Evil One get honours, goods and gold as their reward. Gold
especially. Do you think me suspect?

MOTHER. You'll bring a curse on my house.

STRANGER. Then I'll leave it.

MOTHER. And go into the night. Where?

STRANGER. To seek the only one that I don't hate.

MOTHER. Are you sure she'll receive you?

STRANGER. Quite sure.

MOTHER. I'm not.

STRANGER. I am.

MOTHER. Then I must raise your doubts.

STRANGER. You can't.

MOTHER. Yes, I can.

STRANGER. It's a lie.

MOTHER. We're no longer speaking kindly. We must stop. Can you sleep in
the attic?

STRANGER. I can't sleep anywhere.

MOTHER. Still, I'll say good-night to you, whether you think I mean it,
or not.

STRANGER. You're sure there are no rats in the attic? I don't fear
ghosts, but ra