FREE BOOKS

Author's List




PREV.   NEXT  
|<   121   122   123   124   125   126   127   128   129   130   131   132   133   134   135   136   137   138   139   140   141   142   143   144   145  
146   147   148   149   150   151   152   153   154   155   156   157   158   159   160   161   162   163   164   165   166   167   168   169   170   >>   >|  
g and slovenly, had become alert and self-reliant. "A man who can do that, doctor, can do great things." A shadow fell on his face. The look of keen intelligence became clouded. His very frame lost its erect poise, and seemed to fall together. His professional air of jaunty cheerfulness forsook him. He huddled himself down into his chair, put his face in his hands, and shuddered. "My dear sir," he said, lifting up his face, "it is quite useless, quite hopeless." "No," said Shock eagerly, "do not say that. Surely the Almighty God--" The doctor put up his hand. "I know all you would say. How often have I heard it! The fault is not with the Almighty, but with myself. I am still honest with myself, and yet--" Here he paused for some moments. "I have tried--and I have failed. I am a wreck. I have prayed--prayed with tears and groans. I have done my best. But I am beyond help." For a full minute Shock stood, gazing sadly at the noble head, the face so marred, the huddling form. He knew something of the agony of remorse, humiliation, fear, and despair that the man was suffering. "Dr. Burton," said Shock, with the air of a man who has formed a purpose, "you are not telling the truth, sir." The doctor looked up with a flash of indignation in his eyes. "You are misrepresenting facts in two important particulars. You have just said that you have done your best, and that you are beyond all help. The simple truth is you have neither done your best, nor are you beyond help." "Beyond help!" cried the doctor, starting up and beginning to pace the floor, casting aside his usual gentle manner. "You use plain speech, sir, but your evident sincerity forbids resentment. If you knew my history you would agree with me that I state the simple truth when I declare that I am beyond help. You see before you, sir, the sometime President of the Faculty of Guy's, London, a man with a reputation second to none in the Metropolis. But neither reputation, nor fortune, nor friends could avail to save me from this curse. I came to this country in desperation. It was a prohibition country. Cursed be those who perpetrated that fraud upon the British public! If London be bad, this country, with its isolation, its monotony of life, and this damnable permit system, is a thousand times worse. God pity the fool who leaves England in the hope of recovering his manhood and freedom here. I came to this God-forsaken, homeless country with som
PREV.   NEXT  
|<   121   122   123   124   125   126   127   128   129   130   131   132   133   134   135   136   137   138   139   140   141   142   143   144   145  
146   147   148   149   150   151   152   153   154   155   156   157   158   159   160   161   162   163   164   165   166   167   168   169   170   >>   >|  



Top keywords:

country

 

doctor

 

London

 

reputation

 

Almighty

 

prayed

 

simple

 

gentle

 

manner

 

casting


speech
 

evident

 

perpetrated

 
forbids
 
sincerity
 
manhood
 

recovering

 
beginning
 

important

 

forsaken


misrepresenting

 

homeless

 

particulars

 

Beyond

 

starting

 

freedom

 

British

 

public

 

isolation

 

resentment


permit
 
monotony
 
system
 

desperation

 

fortune

 

friends

 

thousand

 

Metropolis

 
indignation
 
leaves

declare

 

prohibition

 
Cursed
 

damnable

 
history
 

England

 
Faculty
 

President

 

gazing

 
huddled