e.

"In how many instances has he given a sudden turn to providences,
which have been made means of my deliverance; not only so, but brought
good out of my evil, so that I have been made to wonder, and to say,'
Surely this is the finger of God.'

"I destroy myself, but in thee is my help found. O let these
wanderings end; fix it deep on my mind, that in the Lord only have I
wisdom as well as strength: that 'it is not in man that walketh, to
direct his steps.' When shall I learn to live simply on Christ, by
the light of his pure unerring word, and the Spirit coinciding; and
have done with these carnal reasonings, the wisdom of men. 'Search
me, O Lord, and know my heart; try me, and know my thoughts, and
see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way
everlasting.' Amen."

"MAY 28, 1796.

"This is the anniversary of my dear Jessie's birth, no more to
call us together here; but I yet remember it as a day in which our God
Was merciful to me, and made me the mother of an heir of salvation. I
bless, I praise my covenant God, who enabled me to dedicate her to him
before she was born, and to ask only one thing for her as for myself,
even an interest in his great salvation, leaving it to him to order
the means, time, and manner, as of her natural birth and ripening age,
so of her spiritual birth and ripening for glory; he accepted the
charge, and he has finished the work, to his own glory, to her eternal
happiness, and my joy and comfort. I have witnessed remaining
corruption fighting hard against her, and bringing her again and again
into captivity to the law of sin and death warring against her. I have
seen the rod of God lie heavy upon her, according to the tenor of the
covenant, when she forsook his laws and went astray: when she walked
not in his judgments, but wandered from his way, he visited her faults
with rods and her sins with chastisements, but his loving-kindness he
never took from her, though he often hid it, nor altered the word
which he had spoken, that he would never leave her, never forsake her;
that in due time he would deliver her from all her enemies. I
perceived her desires to be delivered from the world and the body, and
taken home to the bosom of her God, since that appeared at times the
only way she could be delivered from sin. I heard her lament her
unfruitfulness, her unsteadiness: I heard her exclaim, 'Oh, what a
sin