May 20, 1791.

"This day my only son left me in bitter wringings of heart: he is
again launched on the ocean, God's ocean. The Lord saved him from
shipwreck, brought him to my home, and allowed me once more to indulge
the yearning of my heart over him. Short has been the time he has been
with me, and ill have I improved it: he is gone from my sight, and my
heart bursts with tumultuous grief. Lord, have mercy on the widow's
son--'the only son of his mother, and she a widow,'

"I ask nothing in all this world for him: I repeat my
petition--save his soul alive; give him salvation from sin. It is not
the danger of the seas that distresses me; it is not the hardships he
must undergo; it is not the dread of never seeing him more in this
world: it is because I cannot discern the fulfilment of the promise in
him. I discern not the new birth nor its fruits, but every symptom of
captivity to Satan, the world, and self-will. This, O this is what
distresses me: and in connection with this, his being shut out from
ordinances, at a distance from Christians; and shut up with those who
forget God, profane his name, and break his Sabbaths.

"O Lord, many wonders hast thou shown me; thy ways of dealing
with me and mine have not been common; add this wonder to the rest:
call, convert, regenerate, and establish a sailor in the faith. Lord,
all things are possible with thee: glorify thy Son, and extend his
kingdom by sea and land; take the prey from the strong. I roll him
over upon thee. Many friends try to comfort me; miserable comforters
are they all. Thou art the God of consolation; only confirm to me thy
gracious word, on which thou causedst me to hope in the day when thou
saidst to me, 'Leave thy fatherless children, I will preserve them
alive.' Only let this life be a spiritual life, and I put a blank in
thy hand as to all temporal things. 'I wait for thy salvation.' Amen."

Three months afterwards she learned that a press-gang had boarded
the ship in which her son was, and although he was saved from their
grasp by a stratagem of the passengers, yet all his effects were taken
away from him. In the following reflections on this event, the anxious
mother shows that she would not withdraw the blank she had put into
her Redeemer's hands.

"NEW YORK, August 18, 1791.

"Thus far the Lord hath tried me, and kept me to my choice.
This night I have tidings, through a lett