the offending notice by
another merely prohibiting skating.

***

Lord ROBERT CECIL has expressed his willingness to consider proposals for
the reform of the British Consular service. The suggestion, however, that
not more than seventy-five per cent. of our Consular representatives should
be natives of Germany and the countries of her Allies seems a little too
drastic.

***

"Without proficiency with the gloves a man cannot make a really ideal
soldier," said Lieut.-Col. SINCLAIR THOMSON to the Inns of Court O.T.C. On
the other hand we still have a number of distinguished soldiers who before
the War attached paramount importance to their cuffs, collars and ties.

***

The use of luminous paint is being widely advocated with the view of
mitigating the dangers arising from the darkened streets. It is pointed out
that the use of luminous language has already proved of extreme value in
critical situations.

***

"You must shorten sail," said the Chairman of the Henley Tribunal to an
employer who was said to have an indoor staff of thirteen servants. As a
beginning he proposes to take a reef in the butler.

***

It appears that a reduction in the sale of chocolate will adversely affect
the cinema. "All my young lady patrons," says a manager, "require chocolate
in the cinema." It is feared that they will have to go back to the
old-fashioned plan of chewing the corner of the programme.

***

At Hull, the other day, a tram-car dashed into a grocer's shop. No blame
attaches, we understand, to the driver, who sounded his gong three times.

* * * * *

TO THE GERMAN MILITARY PICTURE DEPARTMENT.

[The enemy, in his turn, is exhibiting a film of the fighting on the
Somme. At the close a statement is thrown upon the screen to the effect
that the Germans have "reached the appointed goal."]

On footer fields two goals are situated,
One, as a rule, at either end:
This for attack (in front) is indicated,
And this (to rearward) you defend;
In your remark projected on the screen
You don't say which you mean.

If you refer to ours in that ambiguous
And filmy phrase, why then you lie;
And if to yours--we hope to be contiguous
To our objective by-and-by,
But for the present, though the end is sure,
Your statement's premature.

In fact--to follow up the sporting image
In which you "reach the