ed from rich silks to doily stuffs, his
servants in rags and barefooted; instead of good victuals they now lived
upon neck beef and bullock's liver. In short, nobody got much by the
matter but the men of law.

CHAPTER VII. How John Bull was so mightily pleased with his success that
he was going to leave off his trade and turn Lawyer.

It is wisely observed by a great philosopher that habit is a second
nature. This was verified in the case of John Bull, who, from an honest
and plain tradesman, had got such a haunt about the Courts of Justice,
and such a jargon of law words, that he concluded himself as able
a lawyer as any that pleaded at the bar or sat on the bench. He
was overheard one day talking to himself after this manner: "How
capriciously does fate or chance dispose of mankind. How seldom is that
business allotted to a man for which he is fitted by Nature. It is plain
I was intended for a man of law. How did my guardians mistake my genius
in placing me, like a mean slave, behind a counter? Bless me! what
immense estates these fellows raise by the law. Besides, it is the
profession of a gentleman. What a pleasure it is to be victorious in
a cause: to swagger at the bar. What a fool am I to drudge any more in
this woollen trade. For a lawyer I was born, and a lawyer I will be; one
is never too old to learn."* All this while John had conned over such a
catalogue of hard words as were enough to conjure up the devil; these
he used to babble indifferently in all companies, especially at coffee
houses, so that his neighbour tradesmen began to shun his company as a
man that was cracked. Instead of the affairs of Blackwell Hall and price
of broadcloth, wool, and baizes, he talks of nothing but actions upon
the case, returns, capias, alias capias, demurrers, venire facias,
replevins, supersedeases, certioraries, writs of error, actions of
trover and conversion, trespasses, precipes, and dedimus. This was
matter of jest to the learned in law; however Hocus and the rest of the
tribe encouraged John in his fancy, assuring him that he had a great
genius for law; that they questioned not but in time he might raise
money enough by it to reimburse him of all his charges; that if he
studied he would undoubtedly arrive to the dignity of a Lord Chief
Justice. As for the advice of honest friends and neighbours John
despised it; he looked upon them as fellows of a low genius, poor
grovelling mechanics. John reckoned it more honou