as
I wanted them, always cleaning them herself. No person dined with the
queen but the two princesses royal, the eldest sixteen years old, and the
younger at that time thirteen and a month. Her majesty used to put a bit
of meat upon one of my dishes, out of which I carved for myself, and her
diversion was to see me eat in miniature: for the queen (who had indeed
but a weak stomach) took up, at one mouthful, as much as a dozen English
farmers could eat at a meal, which to me was for some time a very
nauseous sight. She would craunch the wing of a lark, bones and all,
between her teeth, although it were nine times as large as that of a
full-grown turkey; and put a bit of bread into her mouth as big as two
twelve-penny loaves. She drank out of a golden cup, above a hogshead at
a draught. Her knives were twice as long as a scythe, set straight upon
the handle. The spoons, forks, and other instruments, were all in the
same proportion. I remember when Glumdalclitch carried me, out of
curiosity, to see some of the tables at court, where ten or a dozen of
those enormous knives and forks were lifted up together, I thought I had
never till then beheld so terrible a sight.

It is the custom, that every Wednesday (which, as I have observed, is
their Sabbath) the king and queen, with the royal issue of both sexes,
dine together in the apartment of his majesty, to whom I was now become a
great favourite; and at these times, my little chair and table were
placed at his left hand, before one of the salt-cellars. This prince
took a pleasure in conversing with me, inquiring into the manners,
religion, laws, government, and learning of Europe; wherein I gave him
the best account I was able. His apprehension was so clear, and his
judgment so exact, that he made very wise reflections and observations
upon all I said. But I confess, that, after I had been a little too
copious in talking of my own beloved country, of our trade and wars by
sea and land, of our schisms in religion, and parties in the state; the
prejudices of his education prevailed so far, that he could not forbear
taking me up in his right hand, and stroking me gently with the other,
after a hearty fit of laughing, asked me, "whether I was a whig or tory?"
Then turning to his first minister, who waited behind him with a white
staff, near as tall as the mainmast of the Royal Sovereign, he observed
"how contemptible a thing was human grandeur, which could be mimicked by