much longer I should have gone on as a P. A. and P. I.
but the woman I had befriended stepped up and sez, "He means the show
there." And lookin' up, if you'll believe it, I see the words "Hell
Gate," and sez she, "I have got two tickets and my husband don't care
about goin', won't you go with me?"

I thought to myself, he probably thinks he'll have chances to sample
it in the futur, but mebby he wuz jest sulky. But I only sez to her,
"It is the last place I ever laid out to go unless I wuz obleeged to.
But lead on," sez I recklessly, "I'll foller." For the thought had
come to me onbid, How did I know how fur Josiah Allen had
back-slided? How did I know but I'd find him there?

[Illustration: _"We got in a small boat and wuz carried round and round
till we dived into a dark tunnel."_]

But to my great surprise--and I wish Elder Minkley could see it, I
thought mebby it would modify his sermons some--the first thing we see
wuz a great trough of water, and I said to the woman in surprise, "I
never expected that folks would go to this hot place by water!" But
we got into a small boat and wuz carried round and round like a
whirlpool, till the boat got in the very center, when it dived down
into a dark tunnel.

At the further end we climbed out onto a platform, and found ourselves
in a long, low-vaulted place, some like a immense tunnel. We could
jest ketch a glimpse of a light way off at the end, and we sot off for
it, I lookin' clost and sharp on every side for my pardner, hopin' and
dreadin' to find him there. When all of a sudden, the most terrific
yells and shrieks sounded on every side and we see cages of wild
animals on both sides of us movin' up and down howlin' and snarlin'.

Sez the woman, "They're men dressed up as wild beasts."

Sez I, "Have they got to stay here always? Do you spoze it is wrong
doin' that has changed 'em into wild animals?" Sez I, "Judgin' from
the papers some on 'em wouldn't need much of a turn." But oh, I
groaned to myself, "Is Josiah Allen turned into a bear or a cammy
leapord! Is he here? I don't believe," sez I to myself, "he has ever
been bad enough to be turned into anything worse than a sheep or a
rooster." And as I didn't hear any blattin' or crowin', and knowed
that if he had seen me he would have tried to communicate with his
beloved pardner, I felt hopeful he wuzn't there.

We went on and as soon as we got out she asked me if I didn't want to
see the Incubator babies, and bein