a or land their
titles of B. A. or D. D., just so I ever carry the title, won by high
minded and strenous effort, Josiah Allen's wife, P. A. and
P. I.--Public Adviser and Private Investigator. Here, I thought, is
need for a P. A. So I sez to her, yet in a voice her pardner couldn't
help hearin':

"I hearn once of a husbands' meetin' in a revival, when the minister
asked every man to git up who had complaints to make about his wife.
Every man sprung to his feet to once, except one lone man by the door.
And the minister sez, 'My friend, you are one man in a million who
have no complaints to make about your wife.' The man sez, 'That hain't
it; I'm paralyzed, I can't _git_ up.'"

I d'no as the husband I aimed this at took it kind or not, but he
didn't nag his wife any more in my hearin'.

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

IN WHICH I CONTINUE MY SEARCH FOR JOSIAH THROUGH DREAMLAND, HUNTIN'
FOR HIM IN VAIN, AND RETURN TO BILDAD'S AT NIGHT, WEARY AND DESPAIRIN'

CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

IN WHICH I CONTINUE MY SEARCH FOR JOSIAH THROUGH DREAMLAND, HUNTIN'
FOR HIM IN VAIN, AND RETURN TO BILDAD'S AT NIGHT, WEARY AND DESPAIRIN'

Creation wuz such a good show I felt considerable rested and refreshed
when it wuz over. And I thought the woman looked quite a little
perter; it duz down-trod folks lots of good to have somebody take
their part. I felt kinder good to think I had lightened a sister
female's sperit a little, and wuz walkin' along quite comfortable in
mind when like an arrow out of a bo, the old pain and anxiety stabbed
me afresh. Another hour gone and Josiah Allen not found! What shall I
do? Where shall I turn the eyes of my spectacles? Jest as I wuz askin'
this question to my troubled soul I hearn a boy speak to another one
about a futur' state of punishment in sich a vulgar and familiar way
that I turned round to once, carryin' out my roll of Promisicous
Adviser, and I sez, "You wicked boys you, to talk so light of your
future states, I wonder you dast! If I wuz your mother and had had
your bringin' up, you wouldn't dast!"

They looked real impudent at me, and one on 'em sez, "You hain't the
money to go with, that's what ails you."

I sez solemnly, "Riches is a snare. I know how hard it is for the eye
of a needle to have a camel git through it; I know how the rich man
longed for a drop of water. And you'd better meditate on these things
and try to git used to heat, instead of talkin' light about 'em!" I
don't know how