me manner.

"What have I done to your cat, my dear Mrs Jellybag? Why, my dear
madam," said he, assuming an air of surprise, "what _should_ I do to
your cat?"

"You _should_ have left him alone, Mr Admiral; that cat was my
property; if my master permits you to ill-treat the poultry, that's his
concern; but that cat was mine, Sir Hurricane--mine, every inch of him.
The animal has been ill-treated, and sits moping in the corner of the
fireplace as if he was dying; he'll never be the cat he was again."

"I don't think he ever will, my dear Mrs Housekeeper," answered the
admiral drily.

The lady's wrath now began to kindle. The admiral's cool replies were
like water sprinkled upon a strong flame, increasing its force, instead
of checking it.

"Don't dear _me_, Sir Hurricane. I am not one of _your dears_--your
dears are all in Dutchtown, more shame for you--an old man like you."

"Old man!" cried Sir Hurricane, losing his placidity a little.

"Yes, old man; look at your hair--as grey as a goose's."

"Why, as for my hair, that proves nothing, Mrs Jellybag, for though
there may be snow on the mountains there is still heat in the valleys.
What d'ye think of my metaphor?"

"I am no more a _metafore_ than yourself, Sir Hurricane; but I'll tell
you what, you are a _cock-and-hen_ admiral, a dog-in-the-manger
barrownight, who was jealous of my poor tom-cat, because--I won't say
what. Yes, Sir Hurricane, all hours of the day you are leering at every
young woman that passes out of our windows--and an old man too--you
ought to be ashamed of yourself; and then you go to church of a Sunday,
and cry, `Good Lord, deliver us.'"

The housekeeper now advanced so close to the admiral that her nose
nearly touched his, her arms akimbo, and every preparation for boarding.
The admiral, fearing she might not confine herself to vocality, but
begin to beat time with her fists, thought it right to take up a
position; he therefore very dexterously took two steps in the rear and
mounted on a sofa; his left was defended by an upright piano, his right
by the breakfast table with all the tea-things on it; his rear was
against the wall, and his front depended on himself in person. From
this commanding eminence he now looked down on the housekeeper, whose
nose could reach no higher than the seals of her adversary's watch; and
in proportion as the baronet felt his security, so rose his choler.
Having been for many years proctor at the great un