* * * * *

[Illustration: QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS.

_Unfashionable Mother._ "WHAT A SWEET CHILD! HOW OLD IS SHE?"

_Fashionable Mother._ "WELL, REALLY, IF YOU ARE GOING TO ASK _THAT_
SORT OF QUESTION, I'D BETTER SEND FOR THE NURSE!"]

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AN OLD SONG REVIVED.

(_As sung by the Champion Ulster "Comique," Colonel S-nd-rs-n,
to the old tune of "De Groves of de Pool," written by "honest
Dick Millikin."_)

Whillaloo! If they droive us to foighting,
'Tis ourselves who will lead 'em a dance,
Till, loike the Cork bhoys, they're deloighting,
_Back again_ to their homes to _advance_!
No longer in beating such rebels
We'll take than in baiting a bull.
How they'll squake, in effeminate trebles,
When Ulster's battalions are full!
Ri fol didder rol didder rol!

_We_ trate 'em as loving relations?
_We_ trust to the "Union of Hearts"?
_We_ heed the Grand Old One's orations?
_We_ play the Minority's parts?
_We_ bow to the yoke of TIM HEALY?
_We_ stoop to the Papisthry rule?
Faix! them who imagine it really
Must fancy that "Orange" spells "fool."
Ri fol didder rol didder rol!

_We_ consint to a sham House o' Commons
Established on ould College Green?
They fancy we're Radical rum 'uns!
Allaygiance we owe to our QUEEN!
But we're fly to _their_ thraitorous dodges;
Our loyalty's edge would they dull?
Fwit! We'll pour like a flood from our Lodges,
And crack every "National" skull!
Ri fol didder rol didder rol!

We're all friends of Law and of Order,
But would they wrench _us_ from the Crown?
We'll soon be a-singing "_Boyne Water_,"
And marching to "_Croppies, lie down!_"
'Tis we have the Men and the Money,
We don't _want_ to foight, we're quite cool.
But, by Jingo, our foes will look funny,
When Ulster turns out 'gin Home Rule!
Ri fol didder rol didder rol!

To-day in our myriads we muster.
Friendly _warning_ is all that _we_ mean.
About SOLLY's "incitement" Rads fluster;
We're thrue to the Crown and the QUEEN:
But Ulster no "pathriot" shall sever,
And Ulster no "Papish" shall school.
Whillaloo! Here's the Union for ever,
And into the Boyne wid Home Rule!
Ri fol didder rol didder rol!

Och! Here's to Dutch WILLIAM the Pious!
And here's to VICTORIA the Good!