my dress and appearance perfectly
corresponded with my actions. I had not been washed, shaved, or
"cleaned," since I had left the ship, three days before. My beard was
grown, my cheeks hollow, my eyes sunk, and for my stomach, I leave
that to those fortunate Frenchmen who escaped from the Russian
campaign, who only can appreciate my sufferings. My whole haggard
frame was enveloped in a huge blue flushing coat, frosted, like a
plum-cake, with ice and snow.

As soon as I could speak, I said, "I beg pardon, my lord, but I have
had nothing to eat or drink since I left the ship."

"Oh, _then_ you are very welcome," said his lordship; "I never
expected to see you again."

"Then why the devil did you send me?" thought I to myself.

During this short dialogue, I had neither been offered a chair nor any
refreshment, of which I stood so much in need; and if I had been able,
should have been kept standing while I related my adventures. I was
about to commence, when the wine got into my head; and to support
myself, I leaned, or rather staggered, on the back of a chair.

"Never mind now," said the captain, apparently moved from his listless
apathy by my situation; "go and make yourself comfortable, and I will
hear it all to-morrow."

This was the only kind thing he had ever done for me; and it came so
_apropos_, that I felt grateful to him for it, thanked him, and went
below to the gun-room, where, notwithstanding all I had heard and read
of the dangers of repletion after long abstinence, I ate voraciously,
and drank proportionably, ever and anon telling my astonished
messmates, who were looking on, what a narrow escape the dead body
had of being dissected and broiled. This, from the specimen of my
performance, they had no difficulty in believing. I recommended the
three men who had been with me to the care of the surgeon; and, with
his permission, presented each of them with a pint of hot brandy and
water, well sweetened, by way of a night cap. Having taken these
precautions, and satisfied the cravings of nature on my own part, as
well as the cravings of curiosity on that of my messmates, I went to
bed, and slept soundly till the next day at noon.

Thus ended this anomalous and fatal expedition: an ambassador sent
with the sacred emblem of peace, to commit an act of hostility under
its protection. To have been taken under such circumstances, would
have subjected us to be hung like dogs on the first tree; to have gone
unarm