was the
picture of an Indian and as I came near it slowly vanished. When I
returned to my seat, Madame Blavatsky said, "What did you see?" "A
picture," I said. "Tell it to go away." "It is already gone." "So much the
better," she said, "I was afraid it was mediumship. But it is only
clairvoyance." "What is the difference?" "If it had been mediumship, it
would have stayed in spite of you. Beware of mediumship; it is a kind of
madness; I know for I have been through it."

I found her almost always full of gaiety that, unlike the occasional
joking of those about her, was illogical and incalculable and yet always
kindly and tolerant. I had called one evening to find her absent but
expected every moment. She had been somewhere at the seaside for her
health and arrived with a little suite of followers. She sat down at once
in her big chair, and began unfolding a brown paper parcel while all
looked on full of curiosity. It contained a large family Bible. "This is a
present for my maid," she said. "What a Bible and not even annotated!"
said some shocked voice. "Well, my children," was the answer, "what is the
good of giving lemons to those who want oranges?" When I first began to
frequent her house, as I soon did very constantly, I noticed a handsome
clever woman of the world there, who seemed certainly very much out of
place, penitent though she thought herself. Presently there was much
scandal and gossip for the penitent was plainly entangled with two young
men, who were expected to grow into ascetic sages. The scandal was so
great that Madame Blavatsky had to call the penitent before her and to
speak after this fashion, "We think that it is necessary to crush the
animal nature; you should live in chastity in act and thought. Initiation
is granted only to those who are entirely chaste," and so it ran on for
some time. However, after some minutes in that vehement style, the
penitent standing crushed and shamed before her, she had wound up, "I
cannot permit you more than one." She was quite sincere but thought that
nothing mattered but what happened in the mind, and that if we could not
master the mind our actions were of little importance. One young man
filled her with exasperation for she thought that his settled gloom came
from his chastity. I had known him in Dublin where he had been accustomed
to interrupt long periods of asceticism, in which he would eat vegetables
and drink water, with brief outbreaks of what he considere