rocton, in her jolly way, "if he depended on
that to keep him, he'd be ill kept, indeed."

"Why, mamma," said Miss Throcton, reprovingly, "how can you?"

"And why not, Nancy, my child? Bless me! how perfectly absurd to think
of Torbert, all jewels and bangs, with a business. I'll leave it to Mr.
Linden if he ever earned a penny in his life."

"But that is not the test of having a business, dear Mrs. Throcton,"
Linden replied. "I know some wonderfully busy men, whose earnings
wouldn't keep a pug dog."

"Now more than likely something's the matter with his clothes," remarked
plump Miss Nancy, in tones of deep sympathy. "I've often been late
because I couldn't get into mine."

"While we speculate the dinner cools," said Miss Maddledock
suggestively. "Father, will you give your arm to Mrs. Throcton? Mr.
Linden, there stands Miss Nancy. I will go alone and mourn for Mr.
Torbert."

"Now, this is really too bad," said Linden, when they were seated at the
table. "It is a form of social misconduct which goes right at the bottom
of Torbert's character. When he comes I'll tell him the story of a
friend of mine who never was late for dinner in his life, and who
consequently--"

"Died!" interrupted Mrs. Throcton. "I know he did. Any man who never was
late for dinner in his life must in the nature of things have had a
short time to live."

"Come to think of it," said Linden, "he did die, and I never suspected
why before. He was the last man in the world whom I should have thought
the dread angel would want."

"Oh, you never can tell," Mrs. Throcton cheerily declared. "It's all
luck, pure luck. This man died because it isn't in fate for any man who
is never late to dinner to live long, but still living is all luck. If
the 'dread angel,' as you call him, happens to look your way and fancies
you, why, off you go--plunk! like a frog in the pond."

Mrs. Throcton had scarcely concluded this genial doctrine before the
belated guest, all bows, smiles, and graceful attitudes, was rendering
homage to Miss Maddledock.

"Sir!" she said, "you will kindly observe that my aspect is severe. You
are indicted for--for--what is he indicted for, Mr. Linden?"

Linden was a lawyer, and he answered promptly: "For violating Section
One of the Code of Prandial Procedure, which defines tardiness at dinner
as a felony punishable by banishment from all social festivities at the
house where offense is given, for a period of not less than two nor m