hedged in by chairs, but he remained standing. Dash it,
he was staring hard at me, his beady eyes boring like gimlets, don't you
know, and his little shriveled face all puckered up. By Jove, but he
looked sour! Looked like he would bite, or, as Billings said afterward,
would like to, if the human race wasn't poisonous.

"Wonderful stunt, science, isn't it, Professor?" gushed Billings, still
rubbing his hands and grinning like a wild what's-its-name. "Tracing
the orbits of the shooting stars or measuring the animals in the tiny
sewer drop. H'm! Fascinating pursuit! And how marvelous it must be to be
able to classify instantly any specimen of man's or nature's
handiwork--to--a--call the turn, so to speak--right off the bat, as it
were. H'm! We have here to-night--er--"

With his hand upon the pajamas, Billings paused, for the professor paid
no attention--did not even turn round, in fact. He just stood there
staring at me. Billings coughed suggestively.

"H'm! As I was saying, we have with us to-night a specimen," he resumed
a little louder, "I may say an example of something that, while
apparently commonplace and prosaic, is really a rare and unique--"

"Ha--specimen _genus cypripedium_," came in a squeaky bark from the
professor as he held me in his eye. "Linnaeus, 1753. Ha! _Species
acaule_--proper habitat, bogs. Very common--_very_ common, indeed."

He batted at me sourly and seemed disappointed. By Jove, I never felt so
devilish mortified in all my life! Never! I nearly dropped my monocle
and felt myself getting jolly red about the ears. This only seemed to
make it worse.

"Ha--_labellum_ somewhat pinker purple than normal," he proceeded. "H'm!
Unusually fresh specimen."

I looked appealingly at Billings. "Oh, I say, you know!" I exclaimed in
dismay.

Billings had been standing with his mouth agape, but now he made a
stride forward and touched the professor on the arm.

"That's Mr. Lightnut, Professor," he said blandly. "That's not _the_
specimen. H'm! Slight mistake."

Slowly the professor's big head turned on its axis and his little eyes
blinked at Billings nastily.

"I was referring to the orchid in the gentleman's coat," he observed
quietly, and turned back to me.

"Of course! Of _course_!" stammered Billings with eagerness. "My
mistake--one on me. _Stung!_" his lips pantomimed to me.

I addressed the professor hospitably: "Ah! won't you sit down,
Professor?"

He drew back, frowning. "Sit down,