o spend the day, and not to be
back till late at night."

"Stupid fun, after all; the road is roasting, and the place, when you
get there, not worth the trouble; but they 're so proud of visiting a
baronet, that's the whole secret of it, those vulgar Morgans and that
Yankee fellow."

These mutterings he continued while he went on dressing, and though not
intended to be addressed to Joe, he was in no wise disconcerted when
that free-and-easy individual replied to them.

"'Your master 's not coming with us, I believe,' said Mrs. Morgan to
me. 'I'm sure, however, there must have been a mistake. It 's so strange
that he got no invitation.'

"'But he did, ma'am,' says I; 'he got a card like the rest.'"

"Well done, Joe; a lie never choked you. Go on," cried O'Shea, laughing.

"'But you see, ma'am,' says I, 'my master never goes anywhere in that
kind of promiscuous way. He expects to be called on and trated with
"differince," as becomes a member of Parliament--'

"'For Ireland?' says she.

"'Yes, ma'am,' says I. 'We haven't as many goats there as in other parts
I 'm tould of, nor the females don't ride straddle legs, with men's hats
on thim.'"

"You didn't say that?" burst in O'Shea, with a mock severity.

"I did, and more,--a great deal more. What business was it of hers that
you were not asked to the picnic? What had she to say to it? Why did she
follow me down the street the other morning, and stay watching all
the time I was in at the banker's, and though, when I came out, I made
believe I was stuffin' the bank-notes into my pocket, I saw by the
impudent laugh on her face that she knew I got nothing?"

"By the way, you never told me what Twist and Trover said."

"I did."

"Well, what was it? Tell it again," said O'Shea, angrily.

"Mr. Trover said, 'Of course, whatever your master wants, just step
in there and show it to Mr. Twist;' and Mr. Twist said, 'Are you here
again,' says he, 'after the warnin' I gave you? Go back and tell your
master 't is takin' up his two last bills he ought to be, instead of
passin' more.'

"' Mr. Trover, sir,' says I, 'sent me in.'

"'Well, Mr. Twist sent you out again,' says he, 'and there's your
answer.'

"'Short and sweet,' says I, goin' out, and pretending to be putting up
the notes as I went."

"Did you go down to the other fellow's,--Macapes?"

"I did; but as he seen me coming out of the other place, he only
ballyragged me, and said, 'We only discount for them as