forty pounds, say, or thereabout.
Still, that much should tell 'gainst the smartest of eights;
It should give us the race, which is all that we care about.

'Twill be a close fight, bet your boots about that,
_If_ we get a clear course without serious obstruction,
Of which I'm not sanguine; the practice of PAT
Has proved to possess universal seduction.
Our last spin was muffed; never mind whose the fault;
Let bygones be bygones! But now comes the crisis!
It's now win or lose. Every man worth his salt
Will pull like a Titan from Cam or from Isis.

But--pull clean together, and put on the pace
When I call for a spurt, or we're in for a licking.
And, Cox, don't _you_ steer us all over the place.
In the fight that's before us, the course requires picking!
So keep at attention, MAC, sharp all the way;
A split-second's slackness may set our foes grinning.
_Verb. sap.!_ Our last "spin" proved a "mull," I must say;
We _must_ quicken the pace, if this bout we mean winning!

* * * * *

[Illustration: "PUTTING OFF."

GLADSTONE (_the Old Blue_). "NOW, MY BOYS,--WE MUST ROW A QUICKER
STROKE IF WE'RE TO WIN!"]

* * * * *

MIXED NOTIONS.

No. VIII.--THE BOAT-RACE.

_Inquirer._ Are any of you chaps going to the Boat-Race?

_First Well-Informed Man._ No, I shan't. Everybody knows which is
going to win, so there's deuced little interest in the race; and then
you can always read it on the tape at your Club. Besides, I don't care
much about rowing. It's a silly sort of exercise; anybody can do it.

_Second W. I. M._ Have you ever tried?

_First W. I. M._ (_indignantly_). Have I ever tried? Of course I have.
Why, you were with me last Summer when we had that water-party from
Taplow to Cookham.

[Illustration]

_Second W. I. M._ Ah! but you didn't do much rowing then. You let me
get all the blisters, and you just sat in the stern and steered us
like a blessed corkscrew.

_First W. I. M._ Did I? I didn't remember that; but I do remember you
catching about half-a-dozen crabs one after another.

_Second W. I. M._ True enough I caught one, but that was because you
would keep standing up in the boat, and moving your body backwards
and forwards. I suppose you thought the coxswains do that in their
racing-boats?

_First W. I. M._ (_boldly_). They do. I've seen 'em doing it often.

_Second W. I. M._ Why, I