Yorktown, were taken without any charge.
And then there were several baskets of fruit--
Of such as were held in the highest repute--
With nuts, that in reckless profusion were stacked,
And (like most of the jokes) had already been cracked.
The liquors were all of the costliest brands
(They had all been obtained at 'respectable stands');
And as quickly were bottles deprived of champagne,
As ever were clouds of their treasures of rain.
Some lauded the Heidsick, while others concurred
In the settled opinion that 'Mumm' was the word.
The sires and the matrons, the lads and the lasses,
Were pledging each other and clicking their glasses;
And several gentlemen present were fain
Their goblets of stronger potations to drain:
On trifles they certainly never could bandy,
So great was their liking for excellent brandy.
For those who might happen to be in the throng
Whose nerves should be weak, or their principles strong,
A due preparation was graciously made
In the shape of a bowl of the best lemonade.
They ate and they drank, and they laughed and they chattered,
They simpered, and bantered, and lavishly flattered,
Till, finally, weary of such an employment,
They left for the scene of their former enjoyment.

And now, I had hoped there would be a variety,
For dancing, I thought, had been done to satiety;
But, as soon as the party reentered the room,
My hopes were consigned to a terrible doom;
For I saw, to my horror, a body of dancers,
Who were clearly intent on performing 'The Lancers.'

Terpsichore ruled with unlimited sway,
While, moment by moment, the night wore away.
To me, 'twas an agony sadly prolonged,
To stay in that parlor, so heated and thronged,
And witness the sickening, senseless parade,
Which people, who claimed to be sensible, made.
I stood it as long as I could, and as well,
And struggled my rising emotions to quell,
But hotter my blood momentarily grew,
Till objects about me were changing their hue,
And, just as my brain was beginning to totter,
I rushed from the room for some air and some water.
Returning refreshed, my composure resumed,
I awaited the end, like a criminal doomed.
With one demoiselle I essayed to converse,
Whose sense I discovered was not worth a--purse.
Disgusted with one so insipidly brainless,
I turned from a task that was tedious and gainless,
Adapted myself to my strange situation