ims to possess
the power to heal the sick and raise the dead; yet she has retired
with much lucre to her palatial residence, lives like a queen, rolling
in luxury, refusing to exercise her pretended healing power upon the
thousands writhing in agony and whom she claims to be able to cure.
Surely her "Key to the Scriptures" should thunder in her ears the
anathema, "To him who knoweth to do good and doeth it not, to him it
is a sin."

I, too, claim a great discovery, a new "sacred book," which I have
been inspired to write, and if people will give it the implicit faith
required to benefit by "Christian Science," I will guarantee to cure
all mental ills, and to bring eternal peace on earth. I herewith give
my revelation to all, without money and without price, in strong
contrast to the mercenary methods of the Eddy healers. My "science and
health" is _multum in parvo_. Here it is:

Columbus discovered the new world; but his wife discovered the old
world. The name of his wife, of course, was Columba, which in Latin,
means a dove. Columba, the dove, flew forth from the ark, and so
discovered the Eastern Continent. Columbus sailed from G--noa;
but Columba sailed from Noah, and when the gods saw her with the
olive-branch, they said "blessed be the dove, for whosoever shall
receive her by faith into his heart, the same shall be free from
unrest and from war forevermore."

Faith can remove mountains, and faith is all there is to "Christian
Science," so far as we have been able to ascertain. We concede to its
many devotees an almost unlimited amount of this saving grace; but
sincerely claim that our "Columba science" will be equally efficient
for good if received in the same spirit which has greeted the new
gospel promulgated by Saint Mary Baker G. Eddy. _Selah_.

[Illustration: We Steamed up the Lordly St. John's River of Florida.]

CHAPTER XVIII.

IN THE LAND OF FLOWERS.

After these scientific investigations, my wife and I left New England
covered with snow and swept by fierce, freezing winds to find this
far-famed peninsular basking in delicious sunshine, the air full of
the exquisite perfume of orange blossoms and the songs of rejoicing
birds. It was an enchanted land, the balsamic odors from the beautiful
evergreen pine forests starred by the fragrant magnolia blossoms of
spotless white, exorcised the ulceratic demons from throat and lungs.

We feasted upon the delicious fruits and vegetables fresh from th