inor, who has a positive beast of a house-master and is
practically a Bolshevist, says that we ought to go on strike against the
tipping system and demand a regular living wage from relations. He says
that if a scavenger gets four quid a week a fellow who has to tackle
Greek aorists ought to get eight quid a week.

But I'm afraid a strike might aggravate uncles. It's no use upsetting
the goose that lays the silver eggs, so I thought it better to write to
you, pointing out that there was one luxury still at pre-war prices and
that uncles should never miss a chance of indulging in it, and whenever
high prices bothered them they should write us a bright cheerful letter
enclosing a postal order--they're still quite cheap.

Chalmers major, who has read this and leads a sad life, having only
aunts, says that the only hope for him is in fixing a standard tip of
9_s._ 113/4_d._ or, better still, 19_s._ 113/4_d._, that women couldn't
help giving.

So hoping that all uncles will put their hands to the plough--I mean in
their pockets--and then the bitter cry of the New Poor will cease in our
public schools,

Yours respectfully, Bruce Tertius.

* * * * *

"Notice.

My wife, Roxie M. ----, having left my bed and board, I will not
be responsible for any bills contracted after this date, June
21, 1920. Fred ----." _American Paper_.

"Notice.

The undersigned wishes to state I had just cause to leave, but I
left neither bed nor board as I furnished my own board, and the
bed being mine I took it. Roxie ----."

_Same Paper, following day._

A good example of what _Touchstone_ calls "The lie with circumstance."

* * * * *

"To-Night at 9.30.
NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH.
For the first time in Calcutta."
_Indian Paper._

Where was the Censor?

* * * * *

[Illustration: _Bridegroom-Elect_."--and we wants to have the hymn,
'The flag that waved o'er Eden.'"]

* * * * *

THE STATE AND THE SCREEN.

(_By a Student of Film Politics._)

Great satisfaction has been evinced in film circles over the conferment
of a signal honour on Signor Pavanelli, the outstanding Italian
screen luminary. The rank of Chevalier of the Crown of Italy is
equivalent to a knighthood in this country, and Pavanelli's
elevation is a gratifying proof of the paramount position which the
cinem