f as a modest gentleman----

ROOPE.

Ah, there's where you're so hopelessly Victorian and out o' date!

PHILIP.

Well, that's my creed; and, whether I've talent or not, I'd rather
snuff out, when my time comes, neglected and a pauper than go back on
it. [_Walking away and pacing the room._] Oh, but I'm not discouraged,
my dear Robbie--not a scrap! I'm not discouraged, though you do regard
me as a dismal failure.

ROOPE.

[_Deprecatingly._] No, no!

PHILIP.

I shall collar the great public yet. You mark me, I shall collar 'em
yet, and without stooping to the tricks and devices you advocate!
[_Returning to_ ROOPE.] Robbie----

ROOPE.

[_Rising._] Hey?

PHILIP.

[_Laying his hands on_ ROOPE_'s shoulders._] If my next book--my autumn
book--isn't a mighty go, I--I'll eat my hat.

ROOPE.

[_Sadly._] Dear excellent friend, perhaps you'll be obliged to, for
nourishment.

PHILIP.

Ha, ha, ha! [_Taking_ ROOPE_'s arm._] Oddly enough--oddly enough, the
story deals with the very subject we've been discussing.

ROOPE.

[_Without enthusiasm._] Indeed?

PHILIP.

Yes. You hit on the title a few minutes ago.

ROOPE.

Really?

PHILIP.

When you were talking of Ottoline and her people. [_Dropping his
voice._] "The Big Drum."

ROOPE.

[_Thoughtfully._] C-c-capital!

PHILIP.

Titterton, my new publisher, is tremendously taken with the scheme of
the thing--keen as mustard about it.

ROOPE.

Er--pardon me, Phil----

PHILIP.

Eh?

ROOPE.

[_Fingering the lapel of_ PHILIP's _coat._] I say, old man, you
wouldn't be guilty of the deplorably bad taste of putting _me_ into it,
would you?

PHILIP.

[_Slapping him on the back._] Ha, ha! My dear Robbie, half the polite
world is in it. Don't tell me you wish to be left out in the cold!

ROOPE.

[_Thoroughly alarmed._] Dear excellent friend----!

[NOYES _enters again at the do