, whether right or wrong, whatever happened,
_there_ they meant, with a good down-right national and pig-headed
obstinacy, to keep it.

The Chairman was continuing in this strain, but, being interrupted
by a shower of inkstands, was compelled to close his remarks, the
proceedings coming to a somewhat abrupt conclusion, in a scene of
considerable confusion.

* * * * *

THE "STRAIT" TIP.

Oh, Mister BLAINE, we don't complain
That for your country's weal you're caring;
But, clever Yankee, _Punch_ would thank 'ee
Not to be quite so _over-Behring!_

* * * * *

NEW VERSION.--Every dog must have his--_year_ (of muzzling).

* * * * *

THE GAME OF PEACE.

[Illustration]

_April_.--Grand informal meeting of the Crowned Heads of Europe (with
the CZAR in the chair) to discuss a scheme of general disarmament,
at which the Emperor of GERMANY creates a profound sensation by the
announcement that, as a hint to his brother Monarchs, he has himself
gone on to the retired list, burnt his cocked-hat, disbanded the
Pomeranian Grenadiers, and confined Herr KRUPP for ten years in a
second-class fortress.

_May_.--By arrangement, all the great powers call in the uniforms of
all their troops and present them to the King of the BELGIANS, on the
understanding that, as the Emperor of the Congo, he shall forthwith
transport them to Africa, and instantly commence the clothing of seven
millions of the naked native population.

_June_.--One hundred and eighty thousand horses, with military
training, coming suddenly on to the market, four-in-hand Hansoms at a
penny an hour, become common in all the great European capitals, and
the Derby, for which there are 1371 entries, is won by a Cossack pony,
trained in Siberia.

_July_.--The barrels of all the magazine rifles melted down, and
recast, utilised for the production of type-writers, which, being
produced in large quantities, are supplied with instruction gratis
to all the children attending the establishments of the London School
Board, the stocks of the rifles being utilised for the manufacture of
billiard-cues, walking-sticks, and umbrella-handles.

_August_.--It being resolved to use up all the gunpowder without
delay, a perpetual display of fireworks is inaugurated at Vienna,
St. Petersburg, Berlin, Paris, and London, the show in the last-named
capital including a gigantic s