n might be with me in my declining years--if such
were to ever be for me. But I concluded that this might not be.
There was no woman whom I knew or had ever met with that I could love
as your mother loved your father and as he loved her. So I resigned
myself to my fate. I must go my lonely road on to the end. And then
came a ray of light into my darkness: there was you. Though you
might not feel like a son to me--I could not expect it when the
memory of that sweet relationship was more worthily filled. But I
could feel like a father to you. Nothing could prevent that or
interfere with it, for I would keep it as my secret in the very holy
of holies of my heart, where had been for thirty years the image of a
sweet little child--your mother. My boy, when in your future life
you shall have happiness and honour and power, I hope you will
sometimes give a thought to the lonely old man whose later years your
very existence seemed to brighten.

The thought of your mother recalled me to my duty. I had undertaken
for her a sacred task: to carry out her wishes regarding her son. I
knew how she would have acted. It might--would--have been to her a
struggle of inclination and duty; and duty would have won. And so I
carried out my duty, though I tell you it was a harsh and bitter task
to me at the time. But I may tell you that I have since been glad
when I think of the result. I tried, as you may perhaps remember, to
carry out your wishes in another way, but your letter put the
difficulty of doing so so clearly before me that I had to give it up.
And let me tell you that that letter endeared you to me more than
ever.

I need not tell you that thenceforth I followed your life very
closely. When you ran away to sea, I used in secret every part of
the mechanism of commerce to find out what had become of you. Then,
until you had reached your majority, I had a constant watch kept upon
you--not to interfere with you in any way, but so that I might be
able to find you should need arise. When in due course I heard of
your first act on coming of age I was satisfied. I had to know of
the carrying out of your original intention towards Janet Mac Kelpie,
for the securities had to be transferred.

From that time on I watched--of course through other eyes--your chief
doings. It would h