made of the moon. And all the time Basil Grant went on laughing and
eating and drinking, and never threw one glance at us to tell us why he
was there, the king of these capering idiots.

At last came the moment which I knew must in some way enlighten us, the
time of the club speeches and the club toasts. Basil Grant rose to his
feet amid a surge of songs and cheers.

"Gentlemen," he said, "it is a custom in this society that the
president for the year opens the proceedings not by any general toast
of sentiment, but by calling upon each member to give a brief account of
his trade. We then drink to that calling and to all who follow it. It
is my business, as the senior member, to open by stating my claim to
membership of this club. Years ago, gentlemen, I was a judge; I did my
best in that capacity to do justice and to administer the law. But it
gradually dawned on me that in my work, as it was, I was not touching
even the fringe of justice. I was seated in the seat of the mighty, I
was robed in scarlet and ermine; nevertheless, I held a small and lowly
and futile post. I had to go by a mean rule as much as a postman, and
my red and gold was worth no more than his. Daily there passed before me
taut and passionate problems, the stringency of which I had to pretend
to relieve by silly imprisonments or silly damages, while I knew all the
time, by the light of my living common sense, that they would have
been far better relieved by a kiss or a thrashing, or a few words of
explanation, or a duel, or a tour in the West Highlands. Then, as this
grew on me, there grew on me continuously the sense of a mountainous
frivolity. Every word said in the court, a whisper or an oath, seemed
more connected with life than the words I had to say. Then came the time
when I publicly blasphemed the whole bosh, was classed as a madman and
melted from public life."

Something in the atmosphere told me that it was not only Rupert and I
who were listening with intensity to this statement.

"Well, I discovered that I could be of no real use. I offered myself
privately as a purely moral judge to settle purely moral differences.
Before very long these unofficial courts of honour (kept strictly
secret) had spread over the whole of society. People were tried before
me not for the practical trifles for which nobody cares, such as
committing a murder, or keeping a dog without a licence. My criminals
were tried for the faults which really make social li