r this. I have not cried
for two years. I went into the garden last night to see if our old
theatre were still standing. I see it is. I wept there for the first
time in two years, and my heart grew lighter, and my soul saw more
clearly again. See, I am not crying now. [She takes his hand in hers]
So you are an author now, and I am an actress. We have both been sucked
into the whirlpool. My life used to be as happy as a child's; I used to
wake singing in the morning; I loved you and dreamt of fame, and what is
the reality? To-morrow morning early I must start for Eltz by train in
a third-class carriage, with a lot of peasants, and at Eltz the educated
trades-people will pursue me with compliments. It is a rough life.
TREPLIEFF. Why are you going to Eltz?
NINA. I have accepted an engagement there for the winter. It is time for
me to go.
TREPLIEFF. Nina, I have cursed you, and hated you, and torn up your
photograph, and yet I have known every minute of my life that my heart
and soul were yours for ever. To cease from loving you is beyond my
power. I have suffered continually from the time I lost you and began
to write, and my life has been almost unendurable. My youth was suddenly
plucked from me then, and I seem now to have lived in this world for
ninety years. I have called out to you, I have kissed the ground you
walked on, wherever I looked I have seen your face before my eyes, and
the smile that had illumined for me the best years of my life.
NINA. [Despairingly] Why, why does he talk to me like this?
TREPLIEFF. I am quite alone, unwarmed by any attachment. I am as cold
as if I were living in a cave. Whatever I write is dry and gloomy and
harsh. Stay here, Nina, I beseech you, or else let me go away with you.
NINA quickly puts on her coat and hat.
TREPLIEFF. Nina, why do you do that? For God's sake, Nina! [He watches
her as she dresses. A pause.]
NINA. My carriage is at the gate. Do not come out to see me off. I shall
find the way alone. [Weeping] Let me have some water.
TREPLIEFF hands her a glass of water.
TREPLIEFF. Where are you going?
NINA. Back to the village. Is your mother here?
TREPLIEFF. Yes, my uncle fell ill on Thursday, and we telegraphed for
her to come.
NINA. Why do you say that you have kissed the ground I walked on? You
should kill me rather. [She bends over the table] I am so tired. If I
could only rest--rest. [She raises her head] I am a sea-gull--no--no,
I am an actress
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