Guards, long-tailed animals, and richly caparisoned; thirdly,
the helmets which had been delivered at Mr. Kemble's house were not
returned until twelve o'clock on the day of action, with three miserable
feathers in each, which appeared to have been plucked from the draggle
tail of a hunted cock; this I also remedied by sending off at the last
moment to the first plumassier for the hire of proper feathers, and the
helmets were ultimately decorated with fourteen superb plumes; fourthly,
the Lord Mayor's officer, who rode in Henry V. armour, jealous of our
stately aspect, attempted to seize one of our horses, on which your
rider made as gallant a retort as ever knight in armour could have done,
and the assailer was completely foiled."

[Illustration: THE LORD MAYOR'S COACH.]

This was bad enough, but in addition to this the narrator makes further
revelation of the behind-the-scenes secrets of a civic pageant sixty
years ago. On the arrival of the procession it was found that no
accommodation had been arranged for "Mr. Elliston's men," nor were any
refreshments proffered them. "For seven hours they were kept within
Guildhall, where they seem to have been considered as much removed from
the necessities of the flesh as Gog and Magog above their heads." At
length the compassion, or perhaps the sense of humour, of certain of the
diners was moved by the forlorn situation of the knights in armour, and
bumpers of wine were tendered them. The man in steel discreetly declined
this hospitable offer, alleging that after so long a fast he feared the
wine would affect him injuriously. It was whispered that his harness
imprisoned him so completely that eating and drinking were alike
impracticable to him. His comrade in brass made light of these
objections, gladly took the proffered cup into his gauntleted hands, and
"drank the red wine through the helmet barred," as though he had been
one of the famous knights of Branksome Tower. It was soon apparent that
the man in brass was intoxicated. He became obstreperous; he began to
reel and stumble, accoutred as he was, to the hazard of his own bones
and to the great dismay of bystanders. It was felt that his fall might
entail disaster upon many. Attempts were made to remove him, when he
assumed a pugilistic attitude, and resolutely declined to quit the hall.
Nor was it possible to enlist against him the services of his brother
warrior. The man in steel sided with the man in brass, and the two