DANIEL. You all appear to be perturbed about something.

BOBBIE. We are.

SYLVIA. Shut up, Bobbie, I'm spokesman.

DANIEL (_weakly_). Couldn't it be some one else? Sylvia's so firm with
me.

SYLVIA. I think, uncle, that you occasionally need firmness. (_Coming
down_ R. _by Chesterfield._)

DANIEL. We all do, it's a weakness of the human race--lack of stamina--I
have it at the moment. Please may I sit down?

OLIVER. Yes.

DANIEL (_sinking into arm-chair_). Thank you so much. (_Weakly._) I
begin to feel sleepy. May I have perhaps--a small glass of water?

BOBBIE. All right--I'll get it. (_He goes to sideboard._)

DANIEL. With perhaps the teeniest, weeniest little drop of whisky?

SYLVIA. This is all useless prevarication, you know--we have some very
important questions to ask you.

DANIEL (_rising_). Perhaps I'd better stand up then, it's more imposing.
(_He takes water from Bobbie._) Thank you a thousand times. Cheerio!!

(_They all make a movement of annoyance._)

SYLVIA. Now then, uncle, we've discovered that you have been deceiving
us....

DANIEL (_amazed_). I--deceive you? I'm pained! I'm hurt! You've wounded
me to the quick.

BOBBIE. I don't believe you've got a quick.

SYLVIA. Shut up, Bobbie!

(FAITH _is by window_ L.)

SYLVIA. Yes, through the agency of Miss Crombie here.

DANIEL. Ah, Miss Crombie, I've just been chatting to your mother. (_Goes
to table and puts glass on it._)

SYLVIA (_ignoring his interruption._) Your dastardly trick has been
exposed, is it or is it not true that you took each of us aside in turn
a year and a half ago and filled us up with confidential lies about your
will?

DANIEL (_bravely_). It's absolutely true.

(_Move from all._)

SYLVIA. Why did you do it?

DANIEL (_laughing with forced roguishness_). Ah!...

SYLVIA (_firmly--with emphasis on each word_). Why did you do it?

DANIEL. Do you really want to know?

EVANGELINE (_below form_). Of course we do.

DANIEL. Very well, then I'll tell you. The reason was this. You were a
set of idle young bounders. (_A move from all._) You'd never done a
stroke of work in your lives--neither have I, but I didn't see why you
shouldn't. There was your poor mother left comparatively hard up--you
would have to have left this house which would have made her perfectly
miserable, so I determined to spur you on to do something (_breaking
into a smile._) I say, you must admit I've succeeded!

SYLVIA. Neve