riskly into the
room, accompanied by a transitory acolyte bearing clothes. "Shall we try
the blue serge first?"

"No, Mr. Thurgood," I said, "we will first talk about uniforms. Could you
make me a uniform like that?" I pointed to an expressionless person tightly
wedged into a dark blue dress.

"An Elder Brother of the Trinity House," said Mr. Thurgood. "I did not
know--am I to congratulate? Of course we shall be proud to do it for you."

"Well, perhaps not yet, Mr. Thurgood. We must wait and see--ha-ha--wait and
see, you know. Let us get on with the blue serge." I took off my coat and
waistcoat.

"Let me help you with the trousers," said Mr. Thurgood. "They'll come off
quite easily over the boots." They did, and I caught a glimpse of my
undergarment as they came off, and clapped my hands on my knees. Why had I
not noticed this before? Each knee was picturesquely darned in an
elaborately cross-hatched pattern.

"I don't think," I said, "we'll worry about the trousers. I can take them
on trust."

"Do you really think so, Sir? It's a difficult leg to fit, you know. Plenty
of muscle here and there. Not like some. You set us a task. There's a good
deal to contend against in a thigh like yours."

"That's it," I cried with enthusiasm. "You can't do yourself justice unless
you've got lots to contend against. I shall make it harder for you if I
don't try on, and your triumph will be all the more glorious."

"It's a curious thing," said Mr. Thurgood, looking meditatively at my
hands; "I've got just such another patch of darning on _my_ knee," and he
pulled up his trouser. "It's funny how you forget to notice a little thing
like that."

"In that case," I said, "we will proceed with the trying on," and I removed
my hands. "I've got two of them, you see."

"So have I," said Mr. Thurgood. "They generally go together."

R. C. L.

* * * * *

From a story in _The Pall Mall Gazette_:--

"'Willie was right,' he muttered. 'The evil men do live after them.
The good oft lies interred in their bones, but maybe it was only folly
with me, not evil.'"

WILLIE was certainly right, but that's not exactly how (in _Julius Caesar_)
he put it.

* * * * *

"When the men went to the scale, the Welshman was found to be
half-a-pound over the stipulated 8st., but he was allowed time to get
this off, and just before three o'clock he passed the w