e absurdity of his position in having given
utterance to a conception at once so feeble and yet so eccentrick; and
being a coarse man, could only get out by passionately going through what
he had to say; 'if--you--were--fond--of--Fish?' And on this occasion each
word seemed to me to have the force of a pistol-shot, and the last word
that of a cannon ball; and he rose as he spoke like a man of might and
purpose as he was, and clenched his hand, and quivered upon the stout bow
legs that sustained him as he stood: '_Fish_,' roared he! 'FISH,' shouted
he! 'I asked you if you were fond of FISH,' thundered he!

'I quite regret being so very deaf to-day, and yet I should be sorry,'
replied his imperturbable friend, fumbling in his pockets and looking
about the couch, 'to lose any observation of yours, and particularly one
in which you seem so earnest; here is a piece of paper, and here is a
pencil; be kind enough to write it down while I get on my glasses.' By the
time his eyes were reinforced the paper was ready, and glancing it over he
answered at once, raising himself suddenly upward, as he exclaimed at the
utmost reach of his voice and with deep and increasing energy, 'Oh, Very!'
'_Very!_' 'VERY!'

'Good morning, Mr. Johnson,' said his now blown and indignant visitor.
'Are you off? Well, good morning, captain!' replied the other; and as soon
as the door was closed, 'My neighbor Captain Tompkins, I am sorry to
perceive, has grown quite as deaf as myself,' said he in a musing manner.
'If I had his legs--'tis there he has the advantage of me--if I had his
legs, I could have collected all the news of the parish in the time that
he has been prosing here about my mare! And I wanted too to know something
this morning about shad. Here, Sally! tell Bob to run down the lane and
find out whether Enoch Smith is going to draw soon; and if Bob meet any
persons on the way with shad let him ask the price of the day before he
says a word to Smith.'

Away flew the little flaxen-haired fairy with her eyes of sapphire,
leaving her grandfather to relapse upon his couch in the posture in which
we first saw him, and to moralize on the impatience with which his
neighbour Captain Tompkins seemed to bear the approaching infirmities of
age. And now, Dear Reader, do thou emulate the patience of the old
Valetudinarian, while I relieve thee of my further presence; or, if thou
wilt permit the thought to enter the charities of thine heart, vanish from