sideways."

"That don't make no difference."

"Yes, it does, too, make a difference. Straight ahead four inches.
that's the rule."

"Well, didn't they go straight ahead four inches? What's a matter with
ye?"

"I'll darn soon show ye what's the matter with me, you come any o' your
shenanigan around here."

"Mighty ready to accuse other folks o' shenannigan, ain't ye? For half
a cent I'd paste you in the moot."

"Now, boys! Now boys! None o' that."

Lots more excitement than a horse-race. Lots more improving to the mind,
and beneficial to the country.

And if you hanker after the human element of skill, what's the matter
with the contest where the women see who can hitch up a horse the
quickest? Didn't you have your favorite picked out from the start? I
did. She was about thirteen years old, dressed in an organdie, and I
think she had light blue ribbons flying from her hat, light blue or
pink, I forget which. Her pa helped her unharness, and you could tell by
the way he look-at her that he thought she was about the smartest
young one for her age in her neighborhood. (You ought to hear her play
"General Grant's Grand March" on the organ he bought for her, a fine
organ with twenty-four stops and two full sets of reeds, and a mirror in
the top, and places to set bouquets and all.) There was a woman in the
contest that seemed, by her actions, to think that the others were just
wasting their time competing with her, but when they got the word "Go!"
(Old Nate Wells was the judge; he sold out the livery-stable business
to Charley, you recollect) her horse backed in wrong, and she got the
harness all twisty-ways, and everything went bewitched. And wasn't she
provoked, though? Served her right, I say. A little woman beside her was
the first to jump into her buggy, and drive off with a strong inhalation
of breath, and that nipping together of the lips that says: "A-a-ah! I
tell ye!" The little girl that we picked out was hopping around like a
scared cockroach, and her pa seemed to be saying: "Now, keep cool! Keep
cool! Don't get flustered," but when another woman drove off, I know she
almost cried, she felt so bad. But she was third, and when she and her
pa drove around the ring, the people clapped her lots more than the
other two. I guess they must have picked her for a favorite the same as
you and I did. Bless her heart! I hope she got a good man when she grew
up.

Around back of the Old Settlers' Cabin, where they h