PING ONLY TO HER': THE CRUX OF MATRIMONY

'We make gods of men and they leave us; others make brutes of them
and they fawn and are faithful!' --OSCAR WILDE.

'It is part of the curse of nature that a man ceases after a time
to worship the body of a woman, and when after that there is nothing
his mind and soul can revere--who shall remain true, as it is
called?' --MARY L. PENDERED.

'And keep thee only to her as long as ye both shall live.' How many men
have solemnly undertaken this exacting vow sincerely meaning to abide by
it? I have no data for answering this question, but I have sufficient
belief in the essential good in human nature to believe that most people
start their married life meaning to be faithful. This belief was not
even shattered by the shock of hearing a very modern bride remark the
other day: 'Max says he can't promise to be faithful but he'll do his
best.' The amazing complacency of the young woman was a thing to marvel
at, though hardly to admire.

Schopenhauer asserts that 'Conjugal fidelity is artificial with men, but
natural to women.' Judging by the Divorce Court returns, it would seem
that this natural feminine trait has weakened somewhat, since this view
was expressed some sixty years ago. According to the Society
chroniclers--self-appointed--it certainly has in 'London's West End,
littered with broken vows.'

It is dangerous to generalise on such a topic, but since people resist
temptation far less often than moralists suppose, it is perhaps safe to
state that when men are faithful, it is principally from lack of
opportunity, or disinclination to be otherwise. This may disgust those
of my feminine readers who refuse to acknowledge, with Professor Lester
Ward, that man is essentially a polygamous animal, but the more
experienced in the sorrowful facts of life will own the truth of this
statement.

On the other hand, when women break their marriage vow, it is seldom for
any merely frivolous or sordid reason (of course excepting the
essentially wanton type, whom no man should be fool enough to marry),
but nearly always either because they are under the spell of infatuation
for the other man, or because they are utterly miserable in their
marriage and seek to drug themselves to forgetfulness or indifference by
means of the poison of some intrigue. Perhaps the Judge who is more
merciful than men will count both these reasons as excuses and will
pardon the sinners who have grea