ight have broken out into revilings and matrimonial warfare, which
are sins; and new sins make work for new confessions.
_Lor._ Well said, i'faith, friar; thou art come off thyself, but poor
I am left in limbo. [_Aside._
_Gom._ Angle in some other ford, good father, you shall catch no
gudgeons here. Look upon the prisoner at the bar, friar, and inform
the court what you know concerning him; he is arraigned here by the
name of colonel Hernando.
_Dom._ What colonel do you mean, Gomez? I see no man but a reverend
brother of our order, whose profession I honour, but whose person I
know not, as I hope for paradise.
_Gom._ No, you are not acquainted with him, the more's the pity; you
do not know him, under this disguise, for the greatest cuckold-maker
in all Spain.
_Dom._ O impudence! O rogue! O villain! Nay, if he be such a man, my
righteous spirit rises at him! Does he put on holy garments, for a
cover-shame of lewdness?
_Gom._ Yes, and he's in the right on't, father: when a swinging sin is
to be committed, nothing will cover it so close as a friar's hood; for
there the devil plays at bo-peep,--puts out his horns to do a
mischief, and then shrinks them back for safety, like a snail into her
shell.
_Lor._ It's best marching off, while I can retreat with honour.
There's no trusting this friar's conscience; he has renounced me
already more heartily than e'er he did the devil, and is in a fair way
to prosecute me for putting on these holy robes. This is the old
church-trick; the clergy is ever at the bottom of the plot, but they
are wise enough to slip their own necks out of the collar, and leave
the laity to be fairly hanged for it. [_Aside and exit._
_Gom._ Follow your leader, friar; your colonel is trooped off, but he
had not gone so easily, if I durst have trusted you in the house
behind me. Gather up your gouty legs, I say, and rid my house of that
huge body of divinity.
_Dom._ I expect some judgment should fall upon you, for your want of
reverence to your spiritual director: Slander, covetousness, and
jealousy, will weigh thee down.
_Gom._ Put pride, hypocrisy, and gluttony into your scale, father, and
you shall weigh against me: Nay, an sins come to be divided once, the
clergy puts in for nine parts, and scarce leaves the laity a tithe.
_Dom._ How dar'st thou reproach the tribe of Levi?
_Gom._ Marry, because you make us laymen of the tribe
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