should have the truth now, with a vengeance. All was falling out exactly
as I had designed. He should not have kept me waiting so long; or I
might not have thought of it.

"Well, Sir," said I, "you will remember I should not have dared to say
it to Your Majesty, had I not been commanded."

He said nothing. Then, once more, I ruffled my growling dog's ears, so
that he snarled.

"First, Sir; to the public I should say: If this is counted brawling,
what of other scenes in Whitehall on which no charge was made? What of
the sun-dial, smashed all to fragments one night, in the Privy Garden,
by certain of the King's Gentlemen whom I could name? What of the broken
door-knockers--not only in the City, but upon certain doors in Whitehall
itself--broken, again by certain of the King's Gentlemen whom I could
name? What of a scene I viewed myself in the Banqueting Hall last
Christmastide in Your Majesty's presence, when a Spanish gentleman
received full in his face a bunch of raisins, from--"

"Ah!" snarled the King. "And you would say that to the public?"

"Sir--that is only the exordium "--(my voice was raised a little, I
think, for indeed I was raging again by now). "Next, I would observe
that Mistress Jermyn is my own cousin, and that the hour was eight
o'clock in the evening--not nine, if I may so far correct Your Majesty;
whereas very different hours are kept by some members of the Court, and
the ladies are not their cousins at all."

I had never seen the King so angry. He was unable to speak for fury. His
face paled to parchment-colour under his sallow skin, and his eyes
burned like coals. This time I lashed my anger, deliberately, instead of
tickling it merely.

"Sir; that is not nearly all; but I will miss out a few points, and come
to my peroration. My peroration would be after this fashion. Such, I
would say, is the charge against one who has been of service to His
Majesty; and such is the Court (as I have described) of that same King.
There is not a Court in Europe that has a Prince so noble as our own can
be, of better parts, or of higher ambitions, or of so pure a blood. And
there is no Prince who is served so poorly; no Court that so stinks in
the nostrils of God and man, as does his. He is capable," I cried (for
by now I was lost to all consideration for myself; my loyalty and love
for him had come to the aid of my anger; and I saw that never again
should I have such an opportunity of speaking my mind), "He i