lic slightly irritable in consequence. Behind the counter are
three Young Ladies, of distinctly engaging appearance, whom we will
call_ Miss GOODCHILD, Miss MEEKIN, _and_ Miss MANNERLY, _respectively.
As the Curtain rises_, Miss GOODCHILD _is laboriously explaining to an
old lady with defective hearing the relative advantages of a Postal and
a Post Office Order_.

_The Old Lady._ Just say it over again, so that a body can hear ye. You
young Misses ought to be taught to speak _out_, 'stead o' mumbling
the way you do. _Why_ can't ye give me a Postal Order for
five-and-fourpence, and a'done with it, eh?

_Miss Goodchild (endeavouring to speak distinctly)._ A _Post Office_
Order will be what you require. See, you just fill in that form, and
then I'll make it out--it's quite simple.

_Old Lady._ Yes, I dessay, _anything_ to save yourselves a little
trouble! You're all alike, you Post-Office young women. As if I couldn't
send five-and-fourpence to my boy down at Toadley in the 'Ole, without
filling up a parcel o' nonsense!

_Person behind (with a talent for grim irony of a heavy order)._ Can you
inform me whether there are any arrangements for providing luncheon for
the Public--because, as it appears I am to spend the entire _day_
here----

_Miss Goodchild (sweetly)._ I'm so very sorry to keep you waiting, Sir.
As soon as _ever_ I have attended to this lady!----

_Old Lady._ If you _call_ it attending--which I don't myself. There's
your form.

_Miss Goodchild._ Oh, but you haven't told me whom you want the order
made out to!

_Old Lady._ I did--I told you it was my son. If you hadn't been
woolgathering, you'd ha' heard me. I'm sure _I_ speak plain enough!

_Miss Goodchild (laughing good-humouredly)._ Oh, yes, you speak _very_
plainly--but I want the name in full, please, to put in the
instructions.

_The Person with the Irony._ When you have _quite_ concluded your little
conversation----

_Miss Goodchild (as she fills in the order)._ Now, Sir, what can I do
for you?

_The Person with the Irony._ Well, I should be glad to be informed what
you mean by requiring me to take out a licence for a dog that died of
distemper a fortnight after I had him--and I had a warranty with him
too!

_Miss Goodchild._ Oh, but that isn't my department, you see. You must
go----(_gives him elaborate instructions as to the place he is to apply
to._)

_The Person._ Ah, if you had had the common courtesy to tell me all that
before,