not get excited. I will add 1,000
rubles to it, if need be, from the money I have laid by for my burial.

OSSEP. From your burial money? Have I already fallen so low that I must
ask alms? Keep your money for yourself! I do not want it. Drop that
complaint also, for I am still rich, very rich. How can it injure me
that Santurian has failed? I stand here firm and unshakable, and have
inexhaustible money resources. [_Tearing his hair_.] O God! O God!
[_Walks to and fro excitedly_.] Now I will go and wish my son-in-law
joy. Yes, I must go so that I shall not make myself ridiculous to him.
The man is a government official!
[_Exit right, laughing bitterly_.

CHACHO. Gracious heaven, be thou our saviour and deliverer.

CURTAIN.

ACT SECOND

SCENE I

_A richly furnished sales-room in Barssegh's house_.

MICHO. Two, three, four, five, six and this little piece. It does not
measure so much!

BARSSEGH [_standing up and giving Micho a rap on the nose_]. You have
what is lacking there. Measure again. Now you've got what is lacking. I
will tear your soul out of your body if you measure so that in seven
arschin[44] it comes out one werschok short.

[44] Russian measure of length.

MICHO [_measuring again_]. O dear, O dear!

BARSSEGH. Look out, or I will take that "O dear" out of your ear. Be up
and at it now!

MICHO. Oh, Mr. Barssegh! [_Measuring._] One, two, three--

BARSSEGH. Stretch it, you blockhead.

MICHO [_stretching the cotton_]. Three, four. [_Wipes the perspiration
from his brow_.]

BARSSEGH. What is the matter with you? You sweat as though you had a
mule-pack on your back.

MICHO. Five.

BARSSEGH. Pull it out more.

MICHO. Six and this little piece. It lacks three werschok again.

BARSSEGH [_pulling his ears_]. It lacks three werschok? There they are!

MICHO. Oh my, oh my!

BARSSEGH. You calf; will you ever develop into a man?

MICHO. O dear mother!

BARSSEGH [_pulling him again by the ear_]. Doesn't it grow longer?

MICHO [_crying_]. Dear Mr. Barssegh, dear sir, let me go.

BARSSEGH. I want to teach you how to measure.

MICHO. It reaches, I say; it reaches, indeed; it reaches. Let me
measure again.

BARSSEGH. Now take care that you make it seven arschin.

MICHO [_aside_]. Holy Karapet, help me. [_Measuring_.] One, two--

BARSSEGH. O you blockhead!

MICHO. Three.

BARSSEGH Wake up!

MICHO. Four.

BARSSEGH. Haven't you seen how Dartscho measures?