en.

Caroline allowed two whole days to pass before she would allow
herself to think of what had taken place. She read through half the
nights, so as to secure sleep for herself when she lay down. But on
the third morning she opened her desk in her own room, and sat down
and wrote to Adela Gauntlet.

Littlebath, Friday.

Dearest Adela,

An occurrence has taken place of which I have not yet
allowed myself to think, and which I shall first realize
and bring home to myself in writing to you; and yet before
it happened I had thought of it very often--even talked of
it with aunt Mary; and sometimes thought of it and talked
of it as though it were almost desirable. I wish I may
teach myself so to think of it now.

All is over between me and Mr. Bertram. He came down here
on Tuesday and told me so. I do not blame him. Nor can I
blame him; not at least for what he has done, though his
manner in doing it was very harsh.

I would tell you all if I could, but it is so hard in a
letter. I wish you were here. But no; you would drive me
mad by advice which I could not, would not take. Last
summer, when I was so unhappy in London, aunt and I had
some conversation about our affairs with a person there.
Mr. Bertram heard of this while he was in Paris. He did
not approve of it; and he wrote me, oh! such a letter. I
should have thought it impossible for him to have written
such words to me. I was mad with grief, and I showed this
letter to the same person. There, Adela, I must tell you
all. It was Mr. Harcourt, George's intimate friend. George
particularly begged me in that letter not to talk to him
any more; and yet I did this. But I was half frenzied
with grief; and why was I to obey one who had no right
to command me, and who made his commands so harsh? His
request would have been a law to me.

But I know I was wrong, Adela. I have known it every
minute since I showed the letter. I was sure I was wrong,
because I could not tell him that I had done so. It made
me afraid of him, and I never before was afraid of any
one. Well; I did not tell him, and now he has found it
out. I would not condescend to ask him how; but I think I
know. This at least I know, that he did so in no ignoble
way, by no mean little suspicions. He did not seek to
discover it. It had come upon him like a great blow, and
he came at once