pation, and the lady
in almost the same drowsy attitude, called, A nothing-to-doishness. If
an unexpected visitor should happen to break in upon their solitude,
the lady, in her apology, declares that "she is horribly chagrined, and
most immensely out of countenance, to be caught in such a deshabille:
but, upon honour, she did not mind {64}how her clothes were huddled on,
not expecting any company, there being nobody at home but her husband."

The gentleman, he shakes his guest by the hand, and says, "I am
heartily glad to see you, Jack; I don't know how it was, I was almost
asleep; for, as there was nobody at home but my wife, I did not know
what to do with myself."

END OF PART III.

PART IV.

{65}We shall now consider the law, as our laws are very considerable,
both in bulk and number, according as the statutes declare;
_considerandi, considerando, considerandum_; and are not to be meddled
with by those that don't understand 'em. Law always expressing itself
with true grammatical precision, never confounding moods, cases, or
genders, except indeed when a _woman_ happens accidentally to be slain,
then the verdict is always brought in _man_-slaughter. The essence of
the law is altercation; for the law can altercate, fulminate, deprecate,
irritate, and go on at any rate. Now the quintessence of the law has,
according to its name, five parts. The first is the _beginning_, or
_incipiendum_; the second the _uncertainty_, or _dubitandum_; the
third _delay_, or _puzzliendum_; fourthly _replication_ without _endum_;
and, fifthly, _monstrum et horrendum_.

{66}All which are exemplified in the following cases, Daniel against
Dishclout.--Daniel was groom in the same family wherein Dishclout was
cookmaid; and Daniel, returning home one day fuddled, he stooped down to
take a sop out of the dripping-pan, which spoiled his clothes, and he
was advised to bring his action against the cookmaid; the pleadings of
which were as follow. The first person who spoke was Mr. Serjeant
Snuffle. He began, saying, "Since I have the honour to be pitched upon
to open this cause to your Lordship, I shall not impertinently presume
to take up any of your Lordship's time by a round-about circumlocutory
manner of speaking or talking, quite foreign to the purpose, and not any
ways relating to the matter in hand. I shall, I will, I design to shew
what damages my client has sustained hereupon, whereupon, and thereupon.
Now, my Lord, my client, b