said haughtily.

"Believe _me_ there's enough in it to make it a financial coup, and I ask
you, Prof, isn't a financial coup respectable?"

"You seem to be morally unfitted to comprehend--"

"Pardon _me_! I'm fitted up regardless with all kinds of fixtures. I'm
fixed to undertake anything. Now if you'd prefer the Bunsen Baby Biscuit
bunch--why old man Bunsen would come across--"

"I won't do such things!" I said angrily.

"Very well, very well. Don't get riled, sir. That's only one way to build
on Fifth Avenoo. I've got one hundred thousand other ways--"

"I don't want to talk to you--"

"They're honest--some of them. Say, if you want a stric'ly honest deal
I've got the goods. Only it ain't as easy and the money ain't as big--"

"I don't want to talk to you--"

"Yes you do. You don't reelize it but you do. Why you're fixin' to make
the holler of your life, ain't you? What are you goin' to say? Hey?
What you aimin' to say to make those guys set up? What's the use of
up-stagin'? Ain't you willin' to pay me a few plunks if I _dy_-vulge to
you the most startlin' phenomena that has ever electrified civilization
sense the era of P.T. Barnum!"

I was already hurrying away when the mention of that great scientist's
name halted me once more.

The little flashy man had been tagging along at my heels, talking
cheerfully and volubly all the while; and now, as I halted again, he
struck an attitude, legs apart, thumbs hooked in his arm-pits, and his
head cocked knowingly on one side.

"Prof," he said, "if you'd work in the Tyng-Tyng Company, or fix it up
with Bunsen to mention his Baby Biscuits as the most nootritious of
condeements, there'd be more in it for you an' me. But it's up to you."

"Well I won't!" I retorted.

"Very well, ve-ry well," he said soothingly. "Then look over another line
o' samples. No trouble to show 'em--none at all, sir! Now if P.T.
Barnum was alive--"

I said very seriously: "The name of that great discoverer falling from
your illiterate lips has halted me a second time. His name alone invests
your somewhat suspicious conversation with a dignity and authority
heretofore conspicuously absent. If, as you hint, you have any scientific
information for sale which P.T. Barnum might have considered worth
purchasing, you may possibly find in me a client. Proceed, young sir."

"Say, listen, Bo--I mean, Prof. I've got the goods. Don't worry. I've got
information in my think-box that would make you