attery and bomb a-goin' at the same time. The house trembled,
the lights danced, the walls shuk, the floor come up, the ceilin'
come down, the sky split, the ground rock't--heaven and earth,
creation, sweet potatoes, Moses, ninpences, glory, tenpenny nails, my
Mary Ann, Hallelujah, Sampson in a sim-mon tree, Jerusalem, Tump
Thompson in a tumbler cart, roodle-oodle-oodle-oodle-oodle-ruddle-
uddle-uddle-uddle-raddle-addle-addle-addle-riddle-iddle-iddle-iddle-
reedle-eedle-eedle-eedle-p-r-r-r-r-lang! per lang! per lang!
p-r-r-r-r-r lang! Bang!

"With that bang he lifted himself bodily into the air, and he come
down with his knees, his ten fingers, his ten toes, his elbows, and
his nose, striking every single solitary key on that pianner at the
same time. The thing busted and went off into seventeen hundred and
fifty-seven thousand five hundred and forty-two hemi-demi-semi-quavers,
and I know'd no mo'."

OBITUARY.

BY WILLIAM THOMSON.

"Down the line I'll go," he said,
"To reach the railway station."
_Friends will please accept of this
The only intimation_.

THE EDITOR'S STORY.

(_A YANKEE EDITOR IN ENGLAND_.)

BY ALFRED H. MILES.

The Editor dipp'd his pen in the ink;
He smole a smile and he wunk a wink;
He chuckled a chuck and he thunk a think.

'Twas a time of dearth
Of news, and the earth
Was rolling and bowling along on its axis
With never a murmur concerning the taxes
And never a ruse, or of rumour a particle
Needing a special or claiming an article;
In fact 'twas a terrible time for the papers,
And puzzled the brains of the paragraph shapers,
Till the whole world seem'd nothing but gases and vapours.

And the Editor wrote:
But I'm not going to quote,
Far be it from me to set rumours afloat.
Suffice it to say,
The paper next day
Contain'd such a slasher
For Captain McClasher,
The whole town declared it a regular smasher;
And what made it worse he inserted a rubber,
For the world-renowned millionaire, Alderman Grubber.

Now the Captain, you know, was the son of a gun,
He had fought many duels and never lost one;
He'd met single handed a hundred wild niggers,
All flashing their sabres and pulling their triggers,
And made them all run whether